I M Perfect lady

In a blog, A young girl recounted an encounter with an abusive man, a stranger she happened upon, who took his pleasure by groping her. Its impact was immediately felt deeply…her body and world changed in that moment.

(blog  - http://travelingev.com/2013/10/3-worst-experiences-2-of-3/ )

What struck me, was how she could concentrate on herself, due to it being a stranger.  Meaning, she was able to flee, to remove herself from the situation to never have to be in his space again…to speak freely and was offered help.

How things are so much more complex and long suffering for those whose abusers they call 'dad'….or 'brother', 'uncle' and 'friend'.  And, to be a child…not a young adult.

I think we think, that the silence is due to the severity of the abuse or the lack thereof, when in fact it has much more to do with our relationship to the abuser…and our age and the folks who we share life with.

Abuse feels like abuse.

It doesn't change from person to person.

What is so different is who is the abuser.  

Do we know him.

Do we live with him.

How our parents know him and relate to him.

When an abuser is 'in-house' it is so much harder to tell.

It isn't that the experience isn't felt as deeply or awful…it is that the horrible man is someone we know.  Then what???

Just so interesting for me to hear her story and witness the differences…between family and stranger.