I M Perfect lady

My husband had 'saved' a milk crate of old stuff of mine, that was in a Farm House on our property that is slowly crumbling into itself.  A crate that I wasn't that interested in….really, but did not want to either, just throw it all away.

So yesterday I sorted through it.

It was a pile of old film negatives and pictures…of course family is intersperced with friends and vactions; things we take pictures of.  These were I believe either second prints or ones that for some reason didn't put into photo albums back then.

I seen a small child sitting on my father's lap, he with a pipe in his mouth….a common image if and when you would conjure up his face.  He appeared kind….a loving grandpa…with an innocent child.

I pulled out a bunch to 'save'….and burned the rest of the negatives in a fire outside…and as I vaccumed up leaves, I smelt the burning negatives…all gone up in smoke.

How easy it would be if that is how we dealt with negatives and images we no longer found useful or wanted to treasure.

I kept the one of my father.  

Not out of love and honor, but rather out of acceptance…or maybe its truth.

I saw images of my siblings in their youth and early adulthood.  

A Fall day….flooded with images and feelings then and now….what was and what is.

This morning I watched Rob Bell with Oprah….you can view it

http://www.oprah.com/own-super-soul-sunday/Full-Episode-Oprah-and-Rob-Bell-Video

What I loved about it, is his belief that we are headed for more,

We are headed into better.

That something within him and I, believe that God is pulling us towards a better way.

While some feel that I am doing something wrong for my family…I believe, that I am changing its legacy.

That there is hope outside of negatives. That burning them isn't enough.

We have to live differently.

Yesterday I overheard my husband tell my son; Nothing Son…It is what dad's do.  In reference to the labor of love he toiled over with my son's new truck.  My son asked, "what do I owe you?"

Nothing Son, it is what Dad's do.

My children are experiencing dad in a completely different way.

I am experiencing husband in a completely different way than my mother.

To me, I see a brighter future…one that I have been reaching towards, seeking….wanting, desiring. 

We can all sit and moan and lament at what we didn't have.  But, we can also have faith in the hope for a better future.

The interview on OWN…. encapsulates how I believe and how I am reaching and being pulled into a brighter future