My daughter waved her hand above her head in a crazy type way in explanation to who I am… Nuts.
Yep, nuts…over zealous about abuse, that I will give up family for it, that I will sever relationships for it. I am WAAAY out there…
Yep, that’s me.
I felt she had me pegged completely; there was no argument there.
While perhaps I would not categorize myself as insane, when it comes to dealing ‘rationally’ with abuse, I guess I am nuts.
I will not tolerate it at all. No matter from whom and especially when it comes to my kids. I am overboard certifiably nuts.
I tried to explain to her my viewpoint, but it is near impossible to explain, it is the old adage, you had to be there.
While I do believe we had a reasonable conversation, I felt she tried to come over to my side… it was impossible for her, and I am grateful.
In order to see abuse like I see abuse, you would have to have been abused like me…she never tasted abuse like I have…her abuse was delivered to her by me.
I told her the only abuse she has ever had came from me.
I was irrational, unreasonable, and way more nuts when they were young compared to how I am today.
She said I am okay now, unless it comes to abuse, then I go nuts. So, I have changed.
In the past I was okay with abuse and went Nuts in the normal day-to-day living. I love this.
Do you get it? I am seen as being nuts for going insane about abuse, by talking of it, warning others of it, writing my way free of it, seeing it when it appears, I am focused and relentless when it comes to abuse.
She said, you go way out there and am unreasonable about abuse, and I smiled and said, “yes that is me, I do do that!”
I tried to explain to her that her grandmother was ‘reasonable’ with abuse. She didn’t want to lose her family so she was kind and ‘rational’ with abuse.
That I am okay being nuts when it comes to abuse.
I truly don’t mind the name calling and the finger pointing, the shunning and anger that is directed toward me as I staunchly remain unreasonable with abuse.
I told her it matters not how they see me. What matters the most is that my children see a mother who will not sit down and be friendly with abuse. I want them to see how to treat abuse by watching me.
Abuse is not my friend.
I will lose relationships to step away from abuse. I will not put ‘family’ above it.
Meaning that just because my father was family, I should over look his abuse. Just because my mother is family, I should overlook the years she overlooked abuse. Just because my brother is family, I should overlook his supporting abuse.
To see family first …is what abuse is relying on.
For if you see the family first, abuse slips by unnoticed.
I am nuts about this, I refuse to let abuse slip by even wearing a tag “Family”.
I M Perfect lady 