What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be. – Ellen Burstyn
The word alone can seem like a very lonely and depressing thing, unless you are whole and alone.
You can also be alone in a room full of people if no one there really understands you, or maybe it is when you don’t understand yourself.
I now have very little trouble being alone, for it seems near impossible to be alone.
When I step outside with nature, I feel that I am with a million friends. I feel that I am interacting with it all the time, that the Sunshine is for me, the moist damp fresh air of rain, for me, the windy air, for me, the crunchy crisp frost, again for me.
And each day is there for me, and what lies ahead, for me.
Sometimes it seems there is a huge salad bar of things offered up to me, and I can select that which fillls me with peace, joy and love, other times it seems the bar is less selective, and then I have to make the best with what I am offered.
My choices at work today will be decided upon a girl who has the option to choose and then I get her leftovers.
One route she did yesterday and took half the mail. I may have to carry half of her work along with all of mine. The other route is smaller but unfamiliar to me. I would like to choose ‘none of the above’.
Whichever route I get that is where I will be today. No point is wishful thinking or getting all worked up in “if only”, it will just take me away from the moment.
My brother’s blog, www.messyguru.typepad.com has referenced a book, Jon Kabit-Zinn's, "Wherever You Go There You Are.”
Wherever I go today, that is where I will be. It is like we walk around with a spot on our backs saying, “You are here.”
At times I get caught up in playing out a scenario of what it will be like way ahead of time arriving.
I almost delivered half the heavy route before I even woke up today.
I am still sitting at home, yet I was almost done lifting all the heavy trays. Trays that I may not even have to do or only do once.
Isn’t it amazing how we can slip quickly into ‘victim’ clothes, how I could give my power over to the lady who chooses first, yet maybe she has the harder job, we don’t know ahead how each mail route will be that day.
My friend who passed away this summer used to say to me, “Just Arrive!”
Life is asking me always to just arrive.
Jon Kabit-Zinn's book, "Wherever You Go There You Are." He writes:
"So there can be no one place to be. There can be no one way to be, no one way to practice, no one way to learn, no one way to love, no none way to grow or to heal, no one way to live, no one way to feel, no one thing to know or be known. The particulars count."
We don’t have to preplan all the planning is done for us.
No need to choreograph life, not need to practice steps before their time.
Here I was dancing dance moves before I even hear the music.
The music is be here now!
