I M Perfect lady

Tag: Spiritual

It is Peaceful

Chapter 12, Spiritual Partnership. I love this about the Diamond Scale.

"My father owned a jewelry store in a small town in Kansas. Somewhere in his career he acquired an antique diamond scale. My mother kept it on a shelf of our family room bookcase. I hardly noticed it until after he passed on. When I did, I was impressed by its quality and elegance. The scale itself was enclosed in a handmade glass and mahogany case. The front panel slid up to allow access to the elegant instrument. Its simplicity and beauty made it a work of art for me. Two brass trays, each suspended from an arm poised on a brass column with a fulcrum at the top, balanced one another perfectly. A long needle-thin pointer, attached to the beam from which the trays hung, descended straight down the full length of the column to the base where vertical markings on a small brass plate showed its slightest deviation from center."

"Below the enclosure was a miniature wooded drawer made with the same care. The drawer contained a small block of wood with small holes of different sizes drilled into it. In each hole a miniature metal weight , molded into the form of a tiny cylinder with a pharmacy-style knob at the top, fit perfectly. A delicate pair of tweezers lay beside the block, and were used to place a diamond onto one of the trays and weights onto the other, one at a time, until the needle again pointed directly downward to center. If too many weights were added to bring the trays into balance again, or too few the discrepancy was immediately evident."

"When both trays were empty, they were level with one another. When a diamond was placed on one tray and its precise weight was placed in the other, they became level again. Only then, at the point of perfect balance, did the long needle point vertically and precisely downward. When either tray was above or below the other, the imbalance was obvious. Perhaps a digital scale could weigh the diamond more precisely, but it would require calibration to insure accuracy. My father's scale does not have this problem. The trays are in perfect balance , full or empty, or they are not. If they are, balance is evident. If they are not, so it the imbalance."

"Equality is like that. It exists or it doesn't. In order to see if you feel equal with another person, picture yourself on one tray of an imaginary diamond scale that is large enough to hold people, and picture another person on the other tray. If the trays are level, you are equal. If they are not, you are unequal. Your weight and the weight of the other person does not affect the positions of the trays as they would on a real scale. For example, you may discover that when you put a child on the other tray, your tray surprisingly, goes up as the the child weighs more than you, or that when you put someone who is heavier than you on the other tray your tray goes down as though you weigh more."

"That is because when you feel superior your tray is always higher than the other tray ( you look down on that person). For example, people who feel superior to their children, or to children in general, always find that their tray is higher when a child is placed on the other tray. These people feel more worthy, important, and valuable than the child (even if they feel that they love the child). People who feel superior in general (or entitled) live on a tray that is always higher regardless of who is on the other tray (for example, a parent or a colleague). On the other hand, people who feel inferior (for instance, need to please) find themselves on the lower tray no matter who is on the other tray (even an abusive partner or insensitive employer). They look up to everyone."

"The slightest experience of superiority or inferiority upsets the balance, and one tray sinks below or rises above the other. The scales always shows your balance (equality) or imbalance (inequality). It is your personal scale. It does not show you the experience of others. They have their own scales. What they see on their scales is for them. What you see on your scale is for you."

"I often discover that my scale is out of balance, no matter how shocked I am at each discovery. The more I explore the frightened parts of my personality, the more I see how superior some of them feel toward women, people who are older, people who are younger, and people who believe, speak or appear differently than I do. Some of the frightened parts of my personality feel that they have no equal in creation, an extraordinarily arrogant (frightened) and inaccurate perception, but not to them. It is a jolt to me to find that they are prejudiced in ways that I abhor, but they exist and until I became aware of them, I could not challenge them and they determined my actions."

"As you become aware of the different parts of your personality, you may discover that your scale is out of balance as frequently as I discovered mine to be, but perhaps in different ways. For example, you may discover a frightened part of your personality that also feels it has no equal in creation, but in the opposite way – it feels inferior to all of creation. It does not want to take up space in the world or be seen, and it subordinates itself to everyone and everything. It cannot imagine feeling other than inferior (although, in fact, it actually feels superior to individuals who feel superior!)."

"Inferiority and superiority are experiences of frightened parts of your personality. Some situations activate frightened parts of your personality and feel inferior, and others stimulate frightened parts of your personality that feel superior. For example, when you put someone on a pedestal (idolize her) you feel inferior to that person, but when she fails to meet your expectations (this always happens) she falls off the pedestal (you feel superior to her). The idol and pedestal are your creations. When you see your idol as a person like you, one illusion (you are inferior) disappears and another illusion (you are superior) replaces it. On the other hand, if you discover that someone you did not consider important (for example a homeless person) can be very helpful to you (he is actually an eccentric billionaire), the reverse happens. The illusion that you are superior (he does not warrant your attention) is replaced by the illusion that you are inferior (your attention is drawn to him magnetically)."

"I was wearing work clothes while speaking with a contractor who was helping Linda and me improve our beautiful home when a subcontractor walked up and abruptly interrupted me to speak with the contractor. When the contractor introduced me as the "property owner," his behavior suddenly and dramatically changed. He turned his full attention toward me, smiled charmingly, and extended his hand. Disregard turned into deference; one frightened part of his personality replaced another when he discovered that I was a potential employer instead of a laborer. He did not think in terms of frightened parts of the personality, but the frightened parts of his personality shaped his perception and behavior first one way and then another."

"Sometimes when I meet someone who has something I want, or I think can help me get what I want, I find myself engaging that person more than others, being more friendly, more available, and more interested in him or her. The tray I am on goes down, and the tray the person is on goes up. I feel inferior and I look up to him or her. The opposite also happens. Sometimes when I meet someone I think cannot help me in any way, I find myself less interested in that person, less available, and more distant in general. The tray I am on goes up, and the tray that person is on goes down. I look down on him or her. I feel superior. In this case, I usually see things about the person that I admire (judge her positively), and in the second case I often see things about the person that I don't like or approve (judge her negatively). In both cases, I fail to see him or her as a soul."

"These are experiences of inequality. In other words, they occur only when frightened parts of my personality are active. Frightened parts of the personality assess the external power of others and compare it with their own. When a frightened part of our personality calculates that it has more power (ability to manipulate and control), you feel safe and valuable (superior), and your tray rises. When it calculates that it has less, you feel threatened and less valuable (inferior), and your tray sinks."

"Feeling superior or feeling inferior is a message to you that a frightened part of your personality is active and determining your sensations, thoughts, perceptions, and intentions. Your scale (if your picturing it) reflects this." Gary Zukav

What I love about this is that we each have our own inner scale and we can tell how balanced we are by how we feel inside among various people.

I know that in the past my scales was extremely off. I was either very superior and vastly inferior, but seldom or rarely was I ever an equal.

It has taken me many years to balance my inner scales…and there are and will be more situations where I will have to work to find the inner balance.

Raising my children up to a point where we are equals was huge. And even more so, raising myself up to my parents as an equal even more important. The tricky part is not to overcompensate and then become superior, but to see them always as equals.

"There but the grace of God go I…" comes to mind.

To balance the scales often times I have to back up and take a full life review…and see the similarities of the journey.

We all weigh the same…we just perceive us as different.

I was taught as in church, that we were special, the one and only right way, so that immediately plunge everyone else beneath me. I was also raised to be inferior to my parents and actually all elders…and then being a victim of abuse, again lower on the scales.

All my beliefs were with an imbalanced scale inside of me….and it was projected as normal. I bounced high or low…but never felt on an equal ground.

I guess a well adjusted person is one whose scale trays are always balanced, no matter what situation or person they find themselves standing with.

I may not be completely balanced, but I do know that there is a balance and what it feels like to be there…when I am there, it is peaceful.

March 10, 2012
A Journey with your Spirit.

Yesterday I finally heard the definition of a Spiritual Journey that made sense to me. Ed Bacon and Bonnie St. Johns were talking about it in a way that resonated with what I know to be true.

They said it was about sitting with your pain, being aware of suffering and finding out its source…about going into your self, your inner body, to feel emotions and feelings, to sort out the places that are not in alignment with the Universe.

I understood this meaning of a Spiritual Journey.

What I have discovered is that I didn't need to go anywhere, but to become more introspective…to seek to change my perceptions, not to change the situations or others.

It is a journey of going deeper, not away from yourself and out there somewhere…like Heaven is a place we go when we die.

The Spiritual Journey felt to me, like a destination to find the right Master…a journey away from your Self and this present moment.

I have heard it represented as not being within you, but rather a departure from your daily life.

Yet I found that the spiritual journey was the daily life…and the master was your Self. And depending upon what you accepted or denied granted you a Heaven or a Hell. There was nowhere to go but to be here now and to feel the truth of this moment in time.

That is the spiritual journey. It doesn't lead you away from your daily life, but rather allows you stay there.

There is nowhere to go, no one to become, nothing you have to aspire to, no teacher to seek. All you have to be is fully you.

To feel your emotions, to discover your truth and to express your life, and that will have you on a journey with your Spirit.

February 24, 2012
Without you asking, “Why?”

Gary Zukav writes about intentions in his book, "Spiritual Partnerships; The Journey to Authentic Power.

"Intention means different things to five-sensory individuals that it does to multisensory individuals. Five-sensory individuals think of intentions in terms such as "to get a new job." Multisensory individuals go deeper. They ask, "Why do I intend to get a new job?" One reason might be, for example, "to make more money" (other reasons might be to have more prestige, work closer to home, or have a greater sense of meaning), and they keep asking until they find their real reason. Their quest for the deepest Why leads them to their actual intention. For example, a parent may intend to make more money in order to send her child to college. Beneath this intention lie deeper intentions. One parent may intend to send her child to college because she feels obligated, her family expects it, or her neighbor's children are going to college. Another may intend to expose her child to languages, cultures, and disciplines that will stimulate her creativity and passion. These are different intentions, and they will create different consequences."

"The Why beneath the Why (and sometimes the Why beneath that, etc) is the intention that creates the consequences. That is the Why that determines the experience of your life. The parent who sends her child to college to make her (the parent) feel better about herself, as a good as her neighbors or to avoid family disapproval is concerned about herself. The parent who supports her child with the gift of education is concerned about her child. One is taking and the other is giving. One is motivated by fear, and the other is motivated by Love. Both parents set into motion the Universal Law of Cause and Effect and the Universal Law of Attraction and therefore, create different consequences with their intentions. The first parent will experience the pain of discovering that someone she loves is using her for his or her own well being (Universal Law of Cause and Effect) and will attract to her people with hidden agendas (Universal Law of Attraction). The second parent will experience the joy of being cared fro without conditions (Universal Law of Cause and Effect) and will draw to herself people who are concerned for her (Universal Law of Attraction)."

"To the five-sensory perception, these actions are identical – a parent sends a child to college. Without knowing the intention beneath the action, however, it is not possible to know the consequence that the action will create. When I first learned to ski, I would carry my skis on my shoulder with the short ends in front of me and the long ends with the tips behind. However, I soon learned how dangerous that was because I kept forgetting how far the tips extended. When I turned, they swung around fast, causing people to duck and lunge out of the way (and complain). Not knowing your intentions is like carrying long skis on your shoulder into a china shop. Every time you turn, something behind you breaks and you can't see what caused the damage, but you are responsible for it."

"Using your creative power without knowing your intentions is like driving a car with a windshield painted black. You travel, but you do not know where. You expect to arrive at a destination, but when you get out of the car (or the car crashes into something), you discover that where you thought you were going and where you went are different. If you have a need to please people, for example, you will be surprised (and probably have been many times) to discover that they eventually push you away. When your intention is to see a smile or be appreciated in order to feel safe and valuable (this is the pursuit of external power), you will always feel the pain of rejection when you see a frown instead or your efforts are not appreciated. Eventually (or immediately) you will feel abused. Your compulsive efforts to please have a price, and when it is not paid, you become angry. You expect to arrive at appreciation, but your arrive instead at rejection and anger – a very different destination."

"Most people drive with their windshield painted black, for example, the husband provides his wife with home and security and then becomes angry when she does not provide him comfort and sex on demand. Like my friend who thought he loved his dog but became enraged when it failed to meet his expectations (hidden agendas), the husband reached a different destination (frustration, anger and pain) than the one he anticipated (domestic bliss). If you think your windshield is clear, ask yourself how many times you have felt angry, or at least miffed, when someone dismissed a gift that you gave, or there it away. (Another sweater? I've got one already and you know I don't like brown.") Those experiences always signal the presence of an intention that you were not aware of, one that is different from the intention you thought you held."

"This is a common misconception what the healthiest intentions is to "feel good." The addict in the ally injects heroin because it makes him feel good, but it is not making him healthy or even getting him out of the alley. On the other hand, the alcoholic who has just stopped drinking is in excruciating pain, but is becoming healthy. The healthy intention is never to pursue external power. Intending to get attention, for example, with a fast or opulent car, gorgeous spouse, beautiful home, expensive jewelry, ideal life (or anything else) because you feel inadequate, invisible, and powerless without it will not take you where you want to go when your destination is a life of more meaning and less emptiness, more joy and less pain, more love and less fear."

" That life is the potential, and also the evolutionary requirement of, multisensory humans, and all humans are becoming multisensory or soon will be. The casual connections between us are more than physical. We influence another and all of Life with our choices of intention, with our choices of intention we transform our experiences from fear to love (or not), and our world from brutal to compassionate (or not). We are each ultimately responsible for the well-being of all that is. The pursuit of external power is the set of initial conditions that always creates harsh weather. the more we think of ourselves as invisible or powerless, the more we wield our creative power irresponsibly. (and create painful consequences). The more we blame others for our experiences, envy them, or rage at them or ourselves, the more painful consequences we create. The emergence of multisensory perception is a dawn unlike any before, and the rising sun is illuminating a new set of initial conditions that always and everywhere creates the best of all weather." Gary Zukav

What I didn't know is that there were many levels of Whys behind the surface intention or action. That there are literally piles of Whys we need to ask to get to rock bottom. And the rock bottom is covered up, unless you ask "Why?".

However, you could really work this backwards and see your destination. If you don't like where you are, it means the why beneath your intentions drove you there without you asking, " Why?"

February 21, 2012
Words to My Experience.

In the past seven years I have doubted and felt awkward with my new sense of awareness, of being able to discern my truth, while others it seemed were most intent on hiding theirs; I was undressing my truth like a stripper.

Once you have awareness, it doesn't leave you. You can choose not to use it, but it remains inside of you. You now have a sixth sense about you. You see and feel deeper, and have a knowing that can't be set aside.

What I didn't know was how I had it and others appeared not to have it. How it came to me in the middle of a trauma that shattered my whole world. How my perceptions seemed so completely off compared to others. I no longer could fit into my old way of thinking and past relationships. Something seismic had happened.

I am reading a book by Gary Zukav, "Spiritual Partnership: The Journey to Authentic Power, and he writes about my experience.

"This is a book about change, the biggest change possible or imaginable – change bigger than the discovery of fire, bigger than the invention of the wheel, bigger than the origin of cultures, the birth of religions, the rise of nation-states, and the impacts on science. It is bigger than anything that has come before and so big that is not possible to envision what could come after or when."

"This is a book about possibilities. Experiences, insights, motivations, and creations beyond our ability to imagine only a few years ago now call to us, beckoning us to new destinations and yet more new possibilities. All is new and fresh, like a blank page awaiting words, a canvas inviting the first brushstroke. In the past others have glimpsed and sometimes explored, these new possibilities, but now everyone is beginning to see or sense them. We have crossed the threshold and there is no turning back. There is now way to turn back."

"This book is about power. The old kind of power – the ability to manipulate and control – now produces only violence and destruction. This is a real surprise, because the old power enabled us and our ancestors to survive. Like good medicine suddenly turned bad, it is now poison. We used to take it to stay alive. Now we need to avoid it to stay healthy. A new kind of power – authentic power – has become the new good medicine, and we need it to become healthy, nurturing and whole."

"Change, possibilities, and power that we could not have imagined are reshaping the entire human experience. New values, goals and intentions are everywhere appearing like grass in the spring. This grass is growing quickly, and where ever it grows beauty appears. With it comes fields of flowers and vast forests. A new and surprising world is emerging in new ways and surprising ways. We are all students in a new school, explorers in new territory, and pioneers in a new human experience."

"This unprecedented transformation in human experience has two parts. Process A and Process B. Process A is happening automatically, so to speak. No one needs to do anything to make it happen. Process A is occurring in millions of individuals, and soon Process A will occur in all humans. Process B is a different story. It requires Choice. Specifically, YOU must choose to make Process B happen or it will not happen in you. Even if others choose to make Process B happen in themselves, Process B will not happin until you choose to make it happen. In short (1) Process A is happening to everyone, or soon will, and there is nothing you or anyone else can do about it; (2) Process B is happening only to individuals who choose to make it happen in themselves; no one else can make it happen in them; and they cannot make it happen in anyone else."

"Let's give process A and Process B names. Process A is the expansion of human perception beyond what we can see, hear, taste, touch and smell. It is a very big deal. Process A is seeing for yourself that the world is larger than you thought – much larger- and also different than you could have imagined. Before Process A occurs, your perceptions of the world are confined to what your five senses tell you about it. After Process A occurs, your five senses continue to tell you about the world and, in addition, you experience more. The "more" is sometimes difficult to describe to individuals who have not yet experienced Process A, but actually millions of individuals have already experienced Process A or are experiencing it and haven't realized it yet."

"Process A allows you to know things about others that your five senses cannot tell you, for example, that someone is going to call you just before she calls, that your daughter in another city has been in an accident, that your grandparent is passing on, that you should avoid driving until you check the breaks on your car and so on. In other words, Process A involves intuition in a big way. Process A also allows you to experience yourself in new ways, for example, as more than your mind and your body. It reveals your life as purposeful like water calls a thirsty man. Process A allows you to encounter meaning in unexpected ways, for example that everything is perfect or feeling of connection with a stranger. Process A allows you to see from an impersonal perspective. From that perspective, all of your experiences, even the most painful – serve your spiritual development and the spiritual development of those around you. They provide exactly what you need to develop the strength, compassion, and wisdom to give the gifts that you were born to give."

"Process A is an expanded awareness that includes not only the perceptual system of the five senses but also a second system that detects intelligence, compassion, and wisdom that are real but not physical. This system allows you to experience nonphysical reality in many ways including those just mentioned. Process A is multisensory perception. This is the great transformation in human consciousness that is currently emerging throughout the human species. Within a few generations, all humans will be multisensory. They will experience not only the domain of space, time and matter, and duality that has been the totality of experience for most humans since the origin of humanity, but also nonphysical domains and dynamics that affect us and that will affect us."

"This brings us to Process B. Process B is bringing that new potential that comes with Process A into your life. Multisensory perception (Process A) changes your perception, but it does not change you. It shows you things that you could not see before, but it does not make you use your new knowledge. It illuminates dynamics that you could not see – dynamics that you can apply to change your life and world permanently for the better – but it does not require you to apply them. It reveals your creative power, but it does not make you create wisely. On the contrary, you will continue to create as you have in the past until you choose otherwise. If you are angry, for example, Process A (multisensory perception) will not make you less angry. It also will not create different consequences for you than acting with anger has created in the past. People will still avoid you, still be intimidated by you, still refuse to be vulnerable with you, and you will still be isolated, lonely and longing for meaningful relationships, and angry."

"Process B is experiencing and changing in yourself the interior sources of your painful emotions (such as anger, jealousy, vengefulness and so on), obsessive thoughts (such as judging others or yourself, longing for someone or something to change your life, and so on), compulsive activities (such as workaholism, perfectionism, and so on), and addictive behaviors (such as overeating, smoking, drinking alcohol, using drugs, watching pornography, gambling, and so on). It is also experiencing and cultivating in yourself the interior sources of your pleasing emotions (such as gratitude, contentment, appreciation, and awe of Life). In short Process B is creating the fulfilling and joyful life that is calling to you."

"This takes work, but choosing Process B can produce almost instantaneous results in your life. In other words, choosing Process B can fundamentally change your life in a very short time. This does not mean that you become a radically different person the first or second time you engage in Process B. Process B is not that simple or easy. However, each change that you make in yourself as you engage in Process B is fundamentally transformative. The first change is fundamentally transformative, no matter how small it may appear. The second change is fundamentally transformative, and so forth. Process B is incremental. It happens choice by choice, and each choice that you make moves you in a new direction toward a new and healthy goal – a personality whose experiences are so dramatically different that you cannot always forsee what they will be."

"Process B requires you to choose words and deeds, moment by moment, that will create joyful and constructive consequences even when painful or violent emotions roar through you. Process B is changing your life with the force of your own will, guided by your own awareness, with intentions that you consciously choose, assisted by the compassion and wisdom of the Universe experienced in personal and meaningful ways. This transformation is more than change toward a better or more healthy life. It is transformation toward the highest, most noble, healthy, and grounded part of you. That is your soul."

"In other words, Process B is finding and changing all the parts of your personality that do not intend what your soul intends, and finding and cultivating all the parts of your personality that do intend what your soul intends. Your soul intends harmony, cooperation, sharing and reverence for Life. Each time you create with one of these intentions, you create authentic power – a life of meaning and fulfillment, gratitude, vitality, creativity, and joy. Process B is creating authentic power."

"Without Process A (mulitsensory perception) happening to everyone, Process B (creating authentic power) would not be possible for anyone. Process B is aligning your personality with your soul, but your five sense cannot detect your soul. The sou is an interesting idea to some five-sensory individuals, but it is not experientially meaningful to any of them. Now millions of individuals are experiencing multisensory perception (Process A), and they are changing their lives because of it (Process B). You are experiencing multisensory perception or you would not find this book interesting or valuable. The ideas in it have no appeal to intellects that are informed by the five senses alone, but they call to all hearts that are informed by multisensory perception. Multisensory perception and authentic power are the two defining characters of the transformation in human consciousness that is now under way. The first emerges without effort, affects all perception, and reveals new dimensions of experience. The second awaits your commitment, courage, compassion, and conscious communication and actions to bring it into your life. The first is a wondrous gift from the Universe. You must create the second. Multisensory perception does not impair your choice. Multisensory individuals are as free to pursue external power (the old kind of power) as they are to create authentic power, but the choice to pursue external power now leads only to violence and destruction between individuals (at the least), and physical violence and destruction between religions, cultures, and nations. There are no redeeming benefits to the choice of external power. There are no benefits to it at all."

"Five sensory humans evolve by surviving. Multisensory humans evolve by growing spiritually. This dramatic difference requires dramatically different relationships."

"The new type of relationship for multisensory humans who are evolving through creating authentic power is spiritual partnership. A spiritual partnership is a partnership between equals for the purpose of spiritual growth. It attracts multisensory humans who are creating authentic power as much as old-type relationships attracted five-sensory humans who were pursuing external power. The purpose, nature, and function of spiritual partnerships are different. The dynamics of spiritual partnerships and the experience that spiritual partnerships cocreate are different. This new type of relationship is as inseparable from emerging multisensory humans who are creating authentic power as old-type relationships were from five-sensory humans who pursued external power."

"Creating authentic power requires relationships of substance and depth. You cannot grow spiritually until you have the courage to enter into meaningful and significant relationships. In other words, spiritual partnerships are a necessary part of Process B. Every encounter provides you an opportunity to create authentic power, but when your encounters include others who are also using their experiences to create authentic power, the potential for a spiritual partnership comes into being. Potential spiritual partners recognize the commitment, courage, compassion, and conscious communications and actions of one another. They naturally strive to support one another in creating authentic power and to receive the support of one another in creating authentic power. They journey toward the same goal, recognize fellow travelers, and learn from one another. Evolution now requires you to create a fulfilling and joyful life – to give the gifts that you were born to give – and spiritual partnerships bring you into cocreative interactions with others who are doing the same." Gary Zukav

I now can tell those who are going through the changes and those who are not. I feel great comfort in reading this, for it puts words to my experience.

February 19, 2012
He Only Recognizes the Hardware

David Hawkins writes about innocence…from "Healing and Recovery" and perhaps this is the whole journey of life…healing and recovering your innocence.

"To safely do spiritual work and avoid crises, it is necessary to reaffirm, look within, and discover one's own innocence. It really is not safe to do spiritual work unless one has a glimpse of that innate naive innocence and keeps one eye on it at all times, because that innocence is the gateway back to the Truth so one does not get lost in the swamp."

"How do we see that innocence and know its presence? We know that enlightened beings say that all are one with God, and consequently, that which is intrinsically innocent is within us at all times. The knowingness can occur as a matter of revelation or understanding."

"It we look at the consciousness of the child, we see the child's innocence. Everyone agrees on the innocence of the child whose consciousness is not devious. It hasn't learned to lie; it hasn't learned the values of judgment and criticism. The child is openly trusting and innocent, and out of this innocence and trustingness, paradoxically, it begins to learn that which is not the truth. He or she hears the parents say, "We don't play with certain children because they are the wrong race, creed, or color; they belong to the wrong religion," and so hatred is taught to the child. In order for the child to be loyal to the family to honor and love its mother and father, the child has to adopt that teaching."

"As a result, the innocence of the child is exploited by that which is not the truth, and that which is not the truth innocently comes through generation after generation, via the parents, grandparents, other family members, friends, teachers, television, storybooks, and novels. So that which is intrinsically innocent now begins to take unto itself programs and beliefs that are not the truth."

"We can compare the consciousness of the child to the hardware of the computer, and the programming coming in from the social consciousness of the world itself is the software. We see that the computer, the hardware, which is intrinsically innocent, is uncontaminated by the software. You can run any kind of ignorance of negativity or falsehood through a computer, and the computer itself is uncontaminated. You put in the next CD, and the computer's capacity is unimpaired."

"Likewise, that intrinsic innocence within consciousness itself is unimpaired, and that intrinsic innocence is reading these words right now. It is the intrinsic innocence of one's consciousness that is listening and reading, trying to find the truth, trying to tune itself in to what is real."

"That childlike innocence is unchanged throughout one's entire life; it never leaves."

"When looking at what the world calls ego, or what spiritual work calls ego, instead of condemning it, we can see, out of innocence, that is what we believed at the time. What we did was appropriate if that software program had been correct. Therefore, we do not ever really make a 'mistake' in our spiritual work. Everything is on purpose once we set our intention to achieve an understanding of the truth and be open to Grace so that the truth may be revealed in whatever way we wish to hold in mind, in whatever expression is most appropriate. It is important to remember that we have asked for all that is in error (i.e.,ignorance) to be brought up for recognition. It is all right to do that if we realize our innate innocence at the same time."

"We again ask, The innocence of what? It is the innocence not of us as a person but the innocence of consciousness itself because, as a person, we are merely reflecting that which is universal as consciousness itself. What has gone on has happened as a result of the nature of consciousness; therefore, there is no point going into personal self-condemnation about it nor, on the opposite side of the coin, going into personal pride about it."

"Discovering the nature of consciousness itself and looking into the nature of consciousness in our own introspection reveals that everything we have believed in during our whole life has happened out of innocence. Compassion and understanding develop and because of that compassion, we can now see that through our own innocence, we have come to believe what we believe. The willingness to forgive then allows us to see into the hearts of others. Out of our own compassion, we can see the innocence of the child over and over. No matter what the age of the body, the consciousness has remained unchanged. We can still hear the heart of the child within the adult saying "won't," "don't" and so forth; it is the innocence of the child still speaking. We need to keep an eye on that to prevent spiritual crises. It heals conflicts as they arise."

"The reaffirmation of our innocence consists of never buying that anything is 'just' ego; there is no such thing as 'just' ego. Ego, the software, social consciousness, and the programming have been superimposed on that which is not ego but on truth itself and consciousness itself."

"All spiritual crises come from context, meaning, and the way in which a thing is held. If we think our diet is an unspiritual diet, or our lifestyle or what we do for a living are unspiritual, they are merely reflecting a certain level of consciousness."

"Those who have reached very high levels of consciousness condemn nothing. They will affirm, however, that certain levels of consciousness will have consequences, and that a certain lifestyle, one of selling out the truth, about one's self, will bring inner pain and grievance. It is left up to the individual to continue the process, and there is no attempt to control anyone."

"Certain behaviors or self-condemnation will activate energy fields that will be experienced as painful. Again, it is left to the individual to continue or not. However, it is then not seen as a threat but as merely a fact of human consciousness that inner agony can become greater than what it is already is if one violates certain principles. The teaching still holds up that it can be a very high teaching even thought it may warn us that very agonizing painful states of consciousness can come about as a result of certain behaviors."

"All the experience within human consciousness, including all spiritual work, represents a position, a way of being with, and a way of holding what we are always talking about. Even though we think we are talking about the external world, it is really an inner position as a consequence of a certain level of consciousness, of how we choose to be with something, and the pains and agonies that come about as a result of our clinging onto putting our survival on something that is not the truth. Pain tells us that we have put our survival onto something that is a violation of some principle of consciousness. That is really what spiritual work is about."

"The progressive pain of these positions tells us that they are far from the truth not what that they are 'wrong'. As we get closer to the experience of the Presence of God, the inner experience is one of increasing joy and happiness. As we get further from it, it tells us that we are far removed from the truth. Therefore, it is not a 'make wrong'. It is not a right or wrong, it is just that it is painful and does not work."

"The Buddha said that all pain and suffering are based on attachment and desire. " David Hawkings,

If you look at your journey as going from hot to cold, cold meaning away from truth and hot meaning walking with it, you will see life without the right and wrong doing, but instead like a graph or scale.

And your life will be dramatically affected by the closeness to the truth or by how far away you are from it.

What I know for certain it is harder to find the truth, if the truth was not taught to you. In fact to find the truth, you have to first discover what was taught that wasn't the truth…and to fully understand the malleability of our innocence.

It is because we were so innocent, so trusting and our survival depended upon the adults in our worlds, that we slurped up their softwear program.

I can visualize people now by where they are on the sliding scale of truth vs not truth…and the softwear they speak from can give you great insights to if they are hot or cold. And actually, their lives will clearly display how deeply buried is their innocence.

Discovering our innocence is the Spiritual Journey; we will then see what God sees. He only recognizes the hardware…

January 24, 2012
A loving God there.

"In the beginning of the research, we were naive. We assumed that anything labeled as 'spiritual' must be of the highest truth, valid, and something that could be corroborated through one's inner experience. We found that this is not necessarily the case, and what is labeled a spiritual teaching might range anywhere over the Map of Consciousness, all the way from the bottom of the Map, where the teaching was written by those who teach hate as the way to truth, up to those who are most infinitely loving. We found that many of the books were of a negative energy field, meaning that one would end up in a worse condition from getting involved in that particular field of learning and would move further away from the truth than before reading it. Almost half the books in a typical spiritual bookstore are actually fiction."

"As a result we had to look at the value of the research itself. In looking at the field of spiritual research, we found there are no real guidelines for the person approaching spiritual work for the first time or going back into it later in life with a renewed interest. Each approach claimed that it represented the truth, so the self-claims were no indication of validity. We also found that the number of followers and the glamour of riches the teacher of a certain pathway had no correlation with its validity – the number of followers meant nothing, and best sellers were frequently purely fictional."

"A purported teacher could have a great many followers, and yet we discovered that the energy field was in a negative direction, with calibrations being very low. As we got closer to the truth of the great enlightened beings that were acknowledged by all of mankind, the energies always moved upward in a positive direction. The calibrations were always over 600 and on up into the 700's. Therefore, we see how the great teachers -those called avatars – who were on the planet for only a short period of earthly time, changed the face of the world and the belief systems of mankind, breaking new ground and creating a whole new context and set of values because the power and energy of their words were of a such high caliber."

"That which is truthful carries greater power and calibrates at a higher number. It is a higher frequency, and in physics, the higher the frequency, the greater the power. Electrical power, for example, is not transmitted across the countryside at 120 volts; it is transmitted at 30,000 volts or higher. The higher the frequency the greater the power. This is why the words of the great teachers have transformed mankind for thousands of years. Their words are still active and powerful and continue to transform the consciousness of mankind thousands of years later, even though their bodies have left the plant. When we calibrate the energy fields of their work, we see that they are of enormous power, so it is not just what is said, it is the power of the being who says it."

"It has been discovered that, historically, there has really been no safe context or orientation available for people approaching this field, so the way to avoid spiritual crises and the need for spiritual first aid in the future is to back up a bit and do some individual research. The first question to ask about any teaching is, "What is the level of the teaching?" This is helpful because the child within continues to be naive and innocent. The innocence, on the other hand, is twhat leads to error because the innocent mind of the child has no means of discernment. It needs some way to determine what is going to be beneficial."

"it is obvious that if one is involved in a teaching that as an energy field below 200, one will have negative experiences. In contrast, a teaching that has a positive energy field and calibrates at a high level is going to lead into a lovingness, which is the best insurance against spiritual catastrophe. One can ask if the teaching, teacher of the teaching, or the books of the teaching are reflecting a high level. This is not to say it is right or wrong; it is just beneficial to determine its level."

"If a teaching is below 200, at Hatred, for example, it will say that God hates you, your behavior, your impulses and your humanness. Thus, this is a God of Hatred, and the energy field is negative, calibrating even as low as 20, 30, or 40. At that level is hatred, the killing of others and suicide. Thee is a God of death rather than of life. Self-hatred and an inner feeling of being destroyed come from this teaching. If one wishes to follow such a pathway, at least one is going with their eyes open (e.g. terrorism)."

"There are teachings of existentialism that focus on man's hopelessness. They are based upon worshipping the past in which there is a great deal of grief and self-pity toward what has befallen this group of people. There are teachings and teachers who express and exploit the energy field called Fear, in which case the person experiences a fear of God as a punitive God. The energy field is in a negative direction and continues to engender fear."

"All these negative fields have proponents who sound convincing. They are like politicians in the religious or spiritual world and very adept at their convincingness."

"As we move up into Anger, we see those positions that promote anger, conflict, hatred, and religious wars because they are competitive and usually champion a politicized god of retaliation. Because it is a polarized position, it is always viewed that God will punish the nonbelievers, which is usually one of the traditional teachings. It is important to know where this calibrates on the scale so we can see how it correlates with things that are truthful." David Hawkins, "Healing and Recovery".

What I find so discerning is that the word or subject of God and Spirituality can be used and manipulated by fear and the "innocent child" goes along believing.

The FALC, due to its belief that the nonbelievers will be punished, leaves its teachings at the level of Anger. Stunning in its horror as a child of that church.

He goes on to say, " How can we heal what comes up in our lives unless we hold a healing position? It is obvious how critically important it is to know the energy field of a given teaching. If it requires forgiveness, the teachings of the Christ is based on forgiveness. If it requires compassion and understanding, then the teaching will have to be at calibration level 500 and over because healing begins at 540. That which the world call sin is obvious something that requires healing, does it not? Then a healing that is at least at the level of 540 is needed."

"To ask people to bring up something from within into a negative energy field is to bring about upset; therefore it is unsafe to go into any spiritual teaching whatsoever that suggests introspection, soul searching, and purification unless that energy field of that teaching or pathway is positive and at 540 or higher. It is evident how dangeous a lower-level teaching could be – it would be like putting oneself on the operating table and letting one's abdomen be opened by a surgeon who does not have the skill to handle what he is going to discover when he does so. We don't allow a second-year medical student to open abdomens on the operating table. Instead, it is done by someone who has the power. These energy fields have power. It requires a great deal of power and knowledge to open up someone's insides and investigate them."

"We don't advise introspection in the beginnings of the inner process of purification until it is determined tht the teacher, teaching, and those around a person are in the energy field of at least 540, a field that is nurturing, supportive, and forgiving and has the purpose of healing through understanding and true compassion. The God of that kind of energy field would therefore be a God who loves us because healing only occurs through loving, and His love would be unconditional." David

All I can say is wow. Trusting in someone to help nurture you with anger is an impossible feat.

Not only the teachings of the FALC, are preached from the level of anger, but what of the ministers themselves?

There is no way a child in that religion WHO has been abused as a chance in hell of recovering while in that system. None. To operate on their soul while anger curses through their veins and cells.

What a huge affirmation this is for me and why I was so repelled and flung back from this system…It would be impossible to find a loving God there.

January 23, 2012
With a body or without!

Spiritual Education
“Fortunate is the seeker who has not been led away from the straight and narrow path by diversions and popularized attractions. People spend lifetimes searching for authentic teachings and become sidetracked by the seduction of attractive, glamorized aberrations from truth. These turn out to be fictional or romanticized fantasies that attract the naïve person’s inner child. Spiritual fairy tales abound and impress the credulous for whom anything labeled ‘spiritual’ is imbued with a magical glamour. To go through that stage is routine during initial, uncritical enthusiasm and exploration.”

“ The primary problem initially is the lack of awareness of the difference between the truly spiritual reality and the astral, paranormal, or supernatural domains. To the naïve, these latter alternatives seem amazing and impressive. This is due to the discovery that there are surprisingly more areas of human experience that the strictly physical, emotional, and mental ones. Consequently, a ‘right-on’ psychic reading is indeed impressive to an erstwhile, naïve seeker or novitiate. It is also easy to become sidetracked by the seemingly astonishing wonder of a whole new dimension of possible realities.”

“The majority of popular best-selling, supposedly spiritual books is actually fictional, and their average level of truth is a calibrated level 190, as are slick appearing ‘spiritual’ magazines that glamorize fallacious fantasies of ‘other dimensions’, and so on. The paradox is that the appeal is to the naïve seeker who has not yet mastered this dimension, much less other fanciful ones.”

“There are, of course, other dimensions and ultimate realities that are well represented by adepts, trance readers, channelers, psychics, clairvoyants, shamans, magicians, ‘masters’, deceased celebrities, erstwhile astrologers, throwers of Rune stones, and more. To add to the glamour, many of these diversions have large collections of faithful followers and enthusiasts who are impressed and thereby influenced, as well as seduced, by the magical notion of the unseen paranormal. Also popular are ‘ancient secret mysteries’, UFO religions, primitive rites, magic symbols, crystals, incantations, energy manipulation, and spirits from other realms.”

“Classical spiritual traditions and integrous scripture do not refute the supernatural/paranormal, but warn “not to go there”. The same advice is also prescribed by all true spiritual masters and enlightened teachers. By conscious calibration research, all such ‘entities’ on the ‘other side’ can be calibrated, as well as ‘fallen gurus’ from other eras who succumbed to the illusory gain of power over others by spiritual seduction. (See Lewis, 2001; Partridge, 2003)”

“The so-called ‘astral circus’ was at its most influential in ancient Mesopotamia. The expertise of the adepts, many of who are still the same as they were in that era, have perfected their skills over long periods of earthly time. Like an experienced expert salesman, they intuitively pick up on a vulnerability or a weakness, especially proneness to glamorization. If such entities were indeed what they claim to be, they would have long ago evolved on to the celestial realms.”

“There is no lack of integrous, reliable spiritual truth accessible by ordinary means. Thus, the seeking of the extraordinary is a trap for the unwary. An ego that is ‘out of body’ is actually just the same as an ego in a body, except that it now has the mystification of being physically elusive. Exploration of other dimensions can be facilitated and learned by induced and altered states of consciousness. The primary temptation is one of child-like curiosity. On the other hand, there are some entities on the ‘other side’ that calibrate over 200 but they do not have any information that is not available by ordinary means (e.g., be kind to your neighbor).”

“Supranormal qualities arise as an experiential reality when consciousness levels reach the high 500s as a consequence of the rising kundalini spiritual energy field. These phenomena, classically termed siddhis, are the normal expression of consciousness levels that are beyond linear. The student is advised to be aware that they are not personal and to merely witness the phenomena. By so doing, it will be evident that the phenomena are qualities specific to the spiritual energy itself; they are not personal because they are not controllable by the person. The phenomena, on the other hand, can be impressive as one witnesses the seemingly miraculous events unfold effortlessly. The reason they appear to be miraculous is because of their being witnessed by the linear mind with is limited perception of cause and effect. The unfolding of the seeming miraculous is merely ‘normal’ from a higher perspective.”

“These paranormal spiritual phenomena are described by mystics and saints of various religious denominations and have been reported throughout the ages. By calibration, ‘sainthood’ represents level 570 and above. The siddhis are indeed somewhat wondrous to behold, and the spiritual energy field may, of its own, transmit to other people so that healings take place in accord with karmic propensities. The ‘miraculous’ is thus not volitional or controllable, nor is it the consequence of any person; thus, there is no ‘person’ who performs miracles. It is instead the consequence of the healing power of the Self.”

“The siddhis arise of their own and bring about the capacity for psychomentry, clairvoyance, clairaudience, distant vision, and other telepathic types of faculties. They are also unpredictable and evanescent. Some come and go over variable periods of time that may last from weeks to months to a number of years. With forewarning, the student who witnesses and experiences these phenomena can easily dismiss the temptation of ownership and its implied specialness. Integrity and humility preclude claiming ownership of the phenomena and thus being trapped by an illusion. The siddhis are discussed at some length in “Transcending the Levels of Consciousness.”

David Hawkins – Discovery of the Presence of God

What I found so disheartening, is that the naïve seeker can fall for the same foolery from the ‘other side’ as well as they can from this side.

Now, I have no experience of ‘fallen gurus’ from the other side, but I have witnessed the fallen gurus on this side, preying upon the weak and confused, making them more weak and confused.
I love the line from the Buddha, who says, “If you see a guru along the way, kill him.” Meaning follow no one but your own inner knowing, your own emotional feelings, to set your own compass, to question all things, to seek to be curious, to ask the questions, to look above and below, to be like a child and accept nothing without a question of Why!!!!

Isn’t it chilling that there are fallen gurus on the other side looking for egos in bodies to gain power over??? Again, whether this is the ultimate truth, I can’t say from experience, but somehow it feels correct.

Any guru worth his salt will let you keep your own truth, be he with a body or without!

June 13, 2011
As far as I can tell.

From David Hawkin’s book, Truth vs Falsehood a chapter called, Spiritual Truth.

“While the majority of people in the United States believe in God (90-92%, CNN News, April 2004) and therefore tend to look to established religions for the highest truth, the source of the truth upon which all religions depend stems from the even higher primary source of spiritual reality itself. Thus, religion is the institutional consequence of spiritual truth rather than is origination or primary source. However, because religion incorporates the truth revealed by its founders, the derived teachings are sufficient and satisfactory for the great majority of people for whom the information is facilitated and made available as scripture by institutionalized religion.”

“There as been a great deal of research into the historic origins of the scriptures of all religions, resulting in much discourse and debate over the centuries as to specifics, such as dates, people, and authenticity. Some finalized versions of scriptures were formalized by exclusive councils and became “canons” by virtue of scholastic authority. Technically, interpretation of their meaning is the providence theology, epistemology, metaphysics, and ontology (the science of life).”

“All the great spiritual teachers throughout history were mystics, and the source of their awareness of spiritual truth was the result of Enlightenment and transformational Realization of the Reality of Divinity as the subjective knowingness that ensues from advanced consciousness by virtue of being at One with that Known. Thus, the avatar does not speak from knowing “about” but from the actual Presence within, which radiates forth and constitutes the Essence of that which replaces the mind as the source of understanding and Knowingness (the classic Purusha). The process whereby this transformation occurs has been described in the history of each saint, safe, and divine teacher and is often included in the scripture itself.”

“From a purely research viewpoint, the calibrations of levels of consciousness can be aptly applied to verify the reality of any spiritual teaching, including their traditional scriptures. Each level represents the actuality of the possibilities of consciousness and the progress from the linear to the nonlinear context, which is infinite and beyond space, time or location.”

“The source of the highest spiritual truth is non-mental, and the intellect has difficulty comprehending this critical fact because the mind is intrinsically dualistic and limited, expecting a “this” to come from a “that”. In the advanced spiritual Reality, duality dissolves because the “this” is the “that.” The seeker and the Sought become One with the transcendence of the limitation of duality, i.e., Realization of the Self, Illumination, and Enlightenment, i.e., “The Kingdom of God is within you.”

(he list some calibrations, I will post a few that I recognize)
A Course in Miracles, workbook – 600
A Course in Miracles, textbook – 550
Bhagavad-Gita- 910
Bodhidharma Zen Teachings – 795
Dead Sea Scrolls – 260
Gospel of St. Luke – 699
Gospel of St. Thomas – 660
King James Bible from the Greek –475
Lao-Tsu Teachings –610
New Testament (King James Version after the deletion of the Book of revelations) 790
Torah – 550
Trinity (concept) 945
Yoga Sutras, Patanjali – 740

“Displayed above are integrous calibrated truths available to humankind, some for over thousands of years of evolutionary history. Any single selection is, in and of itself, sufficient for a lifetime of study and spiritual endeavor. As aspirants discover, it is one thing to know about the truth and quite another to understand it or, even more importantly to become it. Spiritual progress is simultaneously simple yet complex, subtle and yet cataclysmic, inspired and yet intimidating. To transcend the limitations of the ego requires intention, integrity of purpose, and resolve (plus grace: the assistance of an advanced teacher and positive karma). The journey often starts seemingly accidentally or as a consequence of curiosity. It then gathers interest and finally involvement, followed by commitment and the discovery of undreamed-of rewards.”

“To facilitate this endeavor, scriptures and the great spiritual classics supply critical information. Commitment to the goals of spiritual progress, in and of itself, has a transformative effect on brain physiology and attracts spiritual energies that shift alignment and power of concordant attractor energy fields. These recontextualize subjective reality and optimize realization.”

“From the calibration levels, it becomes evident that the great sages from the early Aryan culture of ancient India represented the first major emergence of the highest spiritual awareness available to man recorded. The same truths emerged later in different cultures and eras, completely and separately from each other, and yet the realization of the nature of the highest truth was essentially identical in each case, with some variations of expression that reflected cultural and linguistic differences. Thus, truth as such is not exclusive but universal, or it would not be truth. Therefore, spiritual or religious claims of exclusivity indicate the interference and errors of the egos of later followers of the original sages.”

“Truth by definition, has no limitation or qualification and is not discriminatory. Inasmuch as everyone already has a calibratable level of consciousness at birth, the circumstances of that even would imply that they are not accidental but consequent to patterns of spiritual evolution as they manifest in the physical world as culture, family, time, and circumstances. (Consciousness research reveals that the particulars of every individual’s birth are absolutely, perfectly karmically just and maximally advantageous, despite appearances or personal opinion to the contrary.)”

“The calibrations of the world’s greatest teachers are concordant with human experience and validation over great periods of time despite the major cultural changes to which they are relatively immune due to their nonlinear essence. Because truth exists independently of its discovery, like gold, its rediscovery elicits excitement and attraction to a new source.”

“Advanced spiritual students value all sources of truth and often study combinations of them. Thus, the study of Christian mystics clarifies the truths revealed by the Vedas, and, in turn the Vedas clarify Buddhist teachings that then clarify the teachings of Jesus Christ.”

“ The limitation of traditional religious practice has been that it often gets involved with the peripheral issues of times, places, personalities, and ethnic propensities (i.e. form and content). Of greater significance is the study of material that is intrinsic of the truths revealed (i.e., the field) and not the circumstances of the events, as anecdotally interesting as they might be. These trappings, which are actually extraneous, have a negative effect in that they are deceptive, diversionary, and lead to such absurdities as people killing each other over whether or not one should wear a bear or worship on a certain day of the week, the designation of which did not even exist at the time of the appearance of the great avatars. In Realty, which is nontemporal, there are no “days of the week.”

“Religious zealots who kill “nonbelievers” for trivia, such as hats, beards, diets, and designated days of devotion, display the negative fallout of undue emphasis on cultural eccentricities. As readers of the original scriptures can see for themselves, every day is a day of devotion; every day is Sabbath. In the hands of barbarians, trivial differences are magnified and then become merely tools of war that “justify” serious sacrilege and violation of even the simplest of spiritual principles. Perhaps transmission of spiritual truth is best done by example and attraction rather than by promulgation to the people who are incapable of appreciating its value, appropriate use and intention.”
“True missionaries spread valid information and teach by example. Those who are incorrectly motivated become sources of oppression, which leads to revolt (e.g., the Boxer Rebellion).”

“Missionary zeal reaches it ultimate expression as theocracies and the establishment of state religions that utilize force and punitive government regulations. The history of Europe reflects the utilization of religion in the name of monarchies and power struggles involving the nonintegrous exploitation of church authority. Religious conflict has led to religions wars, which have traditionally been the worst of all wars over the centuries and in almost all parts of the globe, even as reflected in current events arising out of the Middle East. Spirituality unites, whereas, unfortunately, the downside of religion divides. Severe distortions of religious truths lead to them becoming the exact opposites in practice.”

“Questionable Scriptures and Notes on the Christian Bible”
Old Testament – 190
Book of Revelations – 70
David Hawkins

What is so amazing is that it seems instead of seeking the truth that the great masters and sages sought, religions are fighting over semantics on the masters journey, completely failing to see the journey of truth while fighting about how they got there.

Religion has done more damage to the truth in life than any other source as far as I can tell.

June 7, 2011
A Course In Weight Loss

I am browsing through “A Course in Weight Loss” by Marianne Williamson, some parts I gloss over, and others parts catch my attention.

This book and Geneen Roth’s “Woman, Food, and God” both are searching beneath the food and looking at the root cause, understanding that the food is a cover-up.

We all know less food equals weight loss, but it also is removing the cotton between feelings and us.

We fear feelings.

We fear feeling feelings.

Marianne writes,

“ With any spiritual journey – and the journey to conscious weight loss is a spiritual journey – things often seem to get worse before they get better. Love’s light is being shined on many places heretofore not visible to your conscious mind, revealing toxic feelings that were there already but cleverly hidden.

It’s all right if this part of your journey is not pleasant. Parts of your repatterning is learning to be with unpleasantness in a healthy way. The mature and sober person knows that on some days things simply feel rotten, and that is okay. You are learning to move through distress by simply being with it, without the need to overeat or to act out in any other way.

How could it not be unpleasant, having to refeel feelings that you’ve been eating for years? Now having to confront them, deal with them, and ultimately accept them feels like a fever within your soul.

But a spiritual fever, like a physical fever, actually has a productive function: it burns disease. Think of your pain as a feverish burning up of fear. As you heal physically, extreme fever can lead to delirium. And as you know heal spiritually, your fever can lead to delirium as well – a quiet delirium of the soul. This too shall pass.

This lesson concerns itself with the human despair and the consistency of the body’s cells. Man has looked beneath the surface of the skin for centuries, probing the internal workings of the human body. During the last century, science has developed the ability to view even the tiniest of cells that make up our physical tissue. Yet science has not yet discovered an explanation for how emotional change produces physical change, and it is particularly blind to the malleability of fat.
In fact, there are many levels of understanding – even of our physical selves – that science has not yet penetrated. An electron microscope reveals the entire picture of our cellular system, but within the cells themselves, there are storehouses of information not yet understood.

For instance, there are tears and then there are tears. Some varieties are toxic to the body, while others healing. The distinction between the two is not just an emotional difference but a physical one as well. Even materially, there are aspects to tears – including functions that affect the workings of the brain – that have not yet been scientifically identified.

Sometimes it’s only through crying tears that need to be shed that we dissolve the unhappiness that caused them. That is why suppressing unhappiness doesn’t tend to end it. How many times have we said that someone ‘needs a good cry.” Indeed. Toxicity is often released through tear ducts as part of the body’s natural genius of flushing itself out. Casual use of antidepressants is unwise for just this reason- feeling the full extent of your sadness is sometimes the only way to heal it. In the absence of the feeling, you miss out on the healing. The body does not make distinctions among physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual stresses. It is equipped with the natural intelligence to address them all.

You are mistaken if you think that you can fundamentally and permanently change bodily symptoms by physical means alone. Problems must leave through the same door they came in. If mistaken thoughts have created a problem, then righting those thoughts is essential for healing it. And if toxic feelings created a problem, they can only leave through a detox process by which they come up again in order to be released.

Fat is not just inert cellular tissue. It is a repository of twisted, distorted thoughts and feelings that didn’t have anywhere else to go. If you remove the fat tissue but do not remove the psychic cause, the fat might go but the causal imprint remains. And the imprint, in time, will attract more substance with which to materially express itself.

It’s not enough to just “lose the weight.” You must lose the emotional weight that lurks behind it. This you have already begun to do. Remember that your food compulsion is a way to cope with painful feelings. As you begin to heal from those feelings –removing their “imprint” from your consciousness – they are necessarily refelt on their way out.

Problems that seem to have nothing to do with your weight issues might rise up and in particularly challenging forms. You might doubt yourself in ways you have not done before, or have not done for a very long time. But this part of the process is not a bad period; it is actually a good one, for it is necessary. There is no spiritual rehabilitation without this kind of detoxification.

When any pain, difficulty, frustration, or challenge emerges, try to see it, honor it, bear witness to it and receive it as part of your healing. The situation carries within it important information for you. It is not just randomly happening at this time. It presents the opportunity to examine critically important issues in your life. Looking at your pain, feeling the feelings, learning whatever lessons are being brought up for review – these are ultimately the only ways to get the pain to burn away.

The Universe will never leave you alone at such a time as this. Angels are all around you, as they gather without fail whenever a soul is seeking its wholeness. This absolutely not the time to isolate; rather despite whatever resistance you feel, allow yourself to join with at least one other human being who might possibly be able to help you. You will learn the serious value of sacred friendship and/or professional counseling.

Sometimes you just need to make space for sadness. You do not need an excuse for why you feel sad; you do not need to ‘fix’ it; and, most important, you do not need to run from it. What you need is to let it come up and simply be with it.

Your task with this lesson is to make space in your life, just as you make space in your heart, for any sadness you need to honor. Perhaps take a walk each evening, or a stroll on the beach each morning. Allow yourself to grieve.

You will learn in time to be with the void, addressing it with a bubble bath rather than with a sandwich, and with prayer time rather than a candy bar. Your task is to inhabit the emptiness, breathe through it, learn its lessons, and hear the message it conveys. There is no hole for you to try and fill with food or anything else; there is only the primal void within every human being when we feel we cannot find God.
Marianne

January 14, 2011
Yoga Heals a Loveless Self

“The purpose of yoga is to heal.

Most people start practicing Bikram Yoga to flatten our stomachs, stretch our tight hamstrings, and/or to prevent future injuries. And yes it will do all of that, but those are the secondary benefits to practicing Bikram Yoga. The purpose of this yoga is TO HEAL and that healing takes place from the inside out. It works on a mental level (and spiritual level) to heal our minds. Only then can we begin to change our self on the outside.

Bikram says, the yoga practice teaches us how to like our self and we start taking better take care of our self then we fall in LOVE with our self!”
Karen Buckner

What I didn’t know when I began this practice was how out of love I was with myself, and how my love of my self depended upon another.

If they loved me, I was okay.

I never loved me alone, by myself without doing for another.

It is shocking how dependent we are taught to be on another’s good opinion, how we act/be/live/think/believe to be loved.
To have another love us, yet we don’t stop and think what it would take for us to love us, alone.

Doing was my self worth, which I mistook for love.

I was worthless unless I was doing.

Imagine this type of self-love where you give and give and give until there isn’t any energy left, until you are filled with resentment of the takers who are your love givers.

Giving to get love?

My damaged body is what drove me to doing yoga, with an arm hanging limply at my side, my upper shoulders and neck one huge knotted ball, I began to work on self.

What I didn’t know was that I was actually filling up my empty tank inside and dumping out all the past beliefs about how to love, changing my inner beliefs of my self, one-second at a time, as I paid attention to my breath and body.

Each day I brought my body to the mat, and focused on my breathing, as I twisted and bent this constricted body into unimaginable poses, I was changing deeply inside.
It is a like strenuous physical magic, while I was concentrating so hard to change my body, my insides were healing, my sense of self blossomed, my inner strength to be me became strong, my mind sought clarity and the willingness to face what is…the list goes on and on.

Yoga heals a loveless self.

November 10, 2010