Head Held High, Being Me.

I wonder what the Guest Speaker will say tomorrow evening at the Dial Help Gala?  I wonder what parts of her 7 1/2 year journey out of dysfunction will come to mind? What would the donors who support Dial Help most want to know?  How often does an event such as this have the opportunity to hear a victim share their story…and what parts would be the most helpful to the community at large?  

I have begun many speeches in my head and when I recognize the lack of an audience, it fizzles out.  

What I know is that I can't prepare more than I already have, that trying to know before I am standing there is impossible.  If I can focus on who I am talking to, I will know what to say.  

I have designated myself, as the unofficial voice of the victim…and I feel that the oppressive silence needs to be broken, and I am the one who is cracking a chip into the wall of shame or fear that holds others back.

I want to put a normal face on sexual abuse victims.  Maybe even more than normal…a face of courage.  I want them to know about our journey and what we are up against and what would be helpful to us.

I want them to hear how keeping silent about abuse locks you into the land of no truths.

I want to stand tall, strong, confident and articulate as me.

It isn't about what I wear, how my haircut makes me look so put together, but rather can I express adequately how abuse changes who you are and then how claiming your truth flips you back to who you were meant to be.

What most victims yearn for is a hearing ear….I will have 100 or so listening to me.  

A message was sent to me today that said,  "I am very proud you are a crusader for victims of abuse.  You are using your energy for a worthy cause."  This is from someone I have not had contact with for many years.

In my response back I found this.