I M Perfect lady

Joining the Team

We have all heard the term "Co-dependent", but I just read "Co-Alcoholic" as a woman described herself being married to an alcoholic.

It somehow puts the other person into the disease much clearer than co-dependent. It shows you being part of the problem more clearly than being dependent upon each other.

I then, of course, looked at other behaviors that we would be Co-Members in….such as Co-drug addict, Co-pedophile, etc.  This to me, joins the so called 'innocent' into the negative energy field as aiding and abetting the addicted individual in a way that isn't just co-dependent, but an active participant in their addiction…enabler.

I had previously seen the co-conspirator, as in denial, but being a co-pedophile, you are doing things to make his addiction continue.  It isn't about denial, it is about allowing and giving ease for him/her to continue this life style.

I believe, if we started defining the non-addictive spouse this way, it may open their eyes to just who they are and what they are doing to actively support a negative lifestyle.

I know that I have seen/felt and believed that my mother was not an innocent party, and defining her as a co-pedophile would be much more accurate than any other word I had.  Where she actively participated to ensure he had his drug of choice and to live his lifestly of choice, he indeed needed a good co-pedophile.

I also enabled him, by denying my own feelings and body.  When I was able to be with my body and speak out about my feelings and truth of my fear of him,  I stopped being a co-pedophile.

Defining those who are willingly, even resentfully, taking care of the addict, in this way, will help not define the addict and blame them….but to see clearly the side of the non-addict…the Co-addict.

It is my belief, that a huge part of the problem is the lack of holding accountable all the co-alcoholics, co-heroin addicts, co-meth addicts, co-child abusers, etc…that if we start focusing on what enables these folks to continue, we will find that the problem doesn't begin and end with one person.

I had to go and look up "Co".

It says, "Jointly, mutually, common…"

Jointly….means, "with another person, together.

So, there you have it.

When you are a Co, you are joining the team.


Published by

bjukuri

Responses

  1. Earl Redinger Avatar
    Earl Redinger

    Beth, isn’t this what all of the discussion is about with the comments here as well as extoots. I know myself I see nothing but co-operation with the alchoholics and abusers who are sitting in those meeting rooms with the leaders of the church we were forced to buy into as innocent children. The beat goes on so to speak so nothing changes that will damage the one true path to everlasting life. Fear, this was placed in us from the time of birth until we came on line with a mind large enough to make our own decisions. That fear is so great that your own mother denies the thing that was damaging her little girl was alive and well sleeping with her at night. My God, Laestadious’ goal was for the material well being of his beloved Indian nation. His doctrine was allowed to exist as a version of our AA program and was then somehow captured by folks who misunderstood the spiritual aspirations of Martin Luther. Martin Luther was about our spiritual well-being. Lars Levi Laestadius was about the material well being of our natural mine. Keep up the good Beth, I really do believe you are changing and awakening a whole lot of minds. Love Earl

    Like

    Reply
  2. beth Jukuri Avatar
    beth Jukuri

    Earl, CO-operation is also, joining the operation. I can’t know what the different agendas were about the founders of the religion, but what I do know is that the members and clergy are not DIS-connecting with members who harm children.
    And, if you are not disconnected, you are connected.
    At times, I get to feeling, that I am taking this estrangement too far, that I have overshot even my wellness, and then I write and consider the applications of not disconnecting and I see and feel that I would be totally a co-pedophile if I hadn’t walked away.
    Thanks, again for your words, I do appreciate them.

    Like

    Reply
  3. Earl Redinger Avatar
    Earl Redinger

    I wish to thank you Beth for allowing my rant and commenting on the cross talk. I know fear is the glue that holds the attention of a lot of folks who are belittling your progress through the damage this fringe belief has caused so many to suffer. And that fear is the belief that their salvation is at stake if the living Christianity were somehow negated. I was only pointing out the irony of what the original thinking was and what it has now become. It was started to illuminate a mental illness, but has replaced it with another mental illness.
    Keep up the wonderful art work Beth, as it is the only thing we have where absolute truth is found as well the one medium which teaches us to think. Earl

    Like

    Reply

Leave a reply to Earl Redinger Cancel reply