“To go against the dominant thinking of your friends, of most of the people you see every day, is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.”
Theodore H. White
Today a sister has a birthday…I am silent.
I will go against the usual Happy Birthday banter and say nothing.
Saying nothing matches the flavor of our relationship, which is nothing.
To pretend that we do have something between us seems pointless to me, to drop our nothingness for one moment to utter ‘happy birthday seems sacrileges.
We both agree we do not match, there is no pretending between us, so it seems even odder to step out of our nothingness to act in a manner of being ‘something’ to each other, and then retreat back into nothingness.
It doesn’t feel heroic, but sad that my relationships between them and me were so easily changed to nothing.
Nothing is what we are to each other.
Not sisters or friends, maybe more like strangers we once thought we knew.
Standing in the truth of nothingness feels better than wanting something from nothing.
I know that I am the one who changed severely, who went against the dominant way of thinking, what I didn’t expect was that, that act alone would relegate me to nothing.
It takes a heroine to be nothing, to stand with yourself, your truths and your perceptions, knowing you are heading against the current and will suffer the consequences.
The consequences are nothing.
I M Perfect lady 