Yesterday I listened to the end of The 19th Wife
and heard the ponderings of Brigham Young as he had to explain his marriages to the outside world. The 19th wife was suing for alimony after she left the faith…And it came down to either denying this faith and what he believed or paying the fees to his wife.
In order to stand straight with the law, he had to admit that he only had one ‘real’ wife, and that the rest were ‘spiritual wives’.
What was so telling is how he couldn’t take his ‘Faith’ outside of the confines of the church, for it wasn’t recognized there…and how it greatly affected the wives by how he spoke of them.
When he denounced his 19th wife in the laws of the land, they all felt the space open up in their promised spot on his celestial planet…it all evaporated like the marriages did when he walked into the court of the land.
They married him for the sole reason of the afterlife promise.
This poignantly showed the vast contrast to our ‘beliefs’ and how they actually walk in life or when taken outside of the churches environment, how others perceive what we have been taught to believe.
Whether you are talking about polygamy or forgiveness of sins, it is the Belief in them and how they are carriages into the afterlife that steer your world today.
And what is even more striking is the way the Faith has to be left behind in order to comply with the law…
It almost seems like there were two Brigham Youngs, when it came down to the ‘crime’ against women. Inside he was heralded as being a great celestial planet populator, and then in the eyes of the law…he is practicing adultery.
What sat with me for the rest of the afternoon, is how Faith oftentimes isn’t supported by the law and this is why there is the separation of church and state.
But when the practices of Faith harm children or women, you certainly have to question just what is your belief?
In the FALC, the forgiveness of sins equals the belief of polygamy for its ultimate goal is a place in the afterlife.
In order to get to heaven you have to overlook lots of things in the present.
My experience with the forgiveness of sins is that it is the delete button for truth and in order for you to be a good Christian; you have to Believe that it (the sin) is no longer there.
So, in the face of reporting abuse…it is impossible to report something you believe is no longer there.
This twisted concept of changing the truth to serve your afterlife, leave the present in quite a mess.
My father’s abusive ways were seen, and then they were Believed to no longer be there. Only a poor Christian would dare drag up the sins and bring them into the authorities.
It is my humble belief that the ministers and church boards main goal is to keep the system going, in fact they will tell you point blank, if you bring up abuse, “their business is the forgiveness of sins.”
As they practice this ‘Belief’ it leaves the abused child in an awkward state. Abused, but can’t be seen as such.
We walk around with the affects of the abuse, while the ‘abuse’ was deleted.
I am not certain I can again, make this point for it is slippery and fluid, the sleight of hands, the magical waving and distorting the truth….
What I had mistakenly focused on was how others couldn’t seem to see the truth, but they can. In order to bless it you have to see it first. But once you see it, bless it, it then disappears.
How can you bring to authorities what You BELIEVE is no longer there?
Their faith would be tried if they went to authorities…they would be challenging the practice of forgiveness if they stepped forth.
This isn’t about delivering the truth, it is about denying their faith.
The main thrust underneath, the fear or pushing them away from speaking out is all about their afterlife promise…and has nothing to do with the affect that has on the children.
They need to see the children as innocent IF their Faith works. If they see abused children, that will mean their Faith didn’t work.
Again, it sounds insane as I speak of this, of the tragedy and incredible twisted and warped sense of living with this every turning of
reality, but it is so.
I lived in this circuitous religion, where nothing was
concrete except the magical Forgiveness of Sins, and the afterlife spot that
this would ensure.
It isn’t that truth and reality isn’t present today, it is there, but their belief is stronger in believing that it can be wiped away.
The child then gets left being untreated.
No longer innocent, for it has suffered abuse.
No place to go.
You are either bad for speaking of it…or bad for no longer
having faith, love and trust, in your parents.
You are hung in between, in the land of flipping realities
and in both places you are damned, for neither place accepts the truth.
And the truth is, you are abused, and someone abused you
and no one will see it for that will mean no heaven for them when they die, so
meanwhile you are unable to be your truth.
The people or very few from the FALC will ever go to the
authorities for it will mean they will have to deny their faith, and in doing
so, give up their spot in heaven. It isn't about abuse, but Heaven.
In the polygamist religions there are “Lost Boys” for they are the residual affect of the plural marriage, if one old man needs to have
many wives, they certainly can’t have young men around.
In the FALC, there are Lost Children.
Children who get left hanging between truth and a deleting
reality…swinging between both poles never fitting in on either end.
The religion needs the truth wiped clean.
The abuse lives within us, and we are unable to get rid of
its grip it now has.
Lost children hang in the balance when they will not deny
their faith…we are denied our truth.
I M Perfect lady 
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