I M Perfect lady

I see two main sticking points between me and my estranged family…and I am certain, they will absolutely agree.

One, I drew a line in the Cement and refuse to budge.  Second, that what I call the truth, they call judgment.  

And really, there is only one sticking point…the line in the cement and it is called the truth….

What is so completely frustrating, is that many will say that they agree with me, that my father is a pedophile, that my mother is 'slightly mental' and both are emotionally bankrupted…and that their lives are a mess…and we all were affected by it, BUT…they will not judge them.

What does that mean?

It appears to me, that this word "judgment" only comes in when the next step would require them to do something...and instead, they will say, "I will let God be the one to judge them…"

I had to go and look up this word Judgment to see just what God is supposed to be doing for these folks, just what are they incapable of doing.

Judgment - the ability to judge, make a decision or form an opinion objectively, authoritatively, and wisely, especially in matters affecting action; good sense; discretion: A man of sound judgment.

This is interesting and completely true in my experiences of them.

It is the inability to make a decision especially in matters affecting action.

So, here is the deal as I see it.  They can't make the decision or form an opinion that is hard and concrete, FOR THEN it will affect their actions. AND, they are not willing at this time, to change their actions….meaning estrange themselves from family.

They remain undecided.  Wow.  I could feel them swinging from side to side, but in actuality, they are only swinging in their minds.  Their actions have not changed one bit.  Nothing has been decided…."God will decide for them…"

Really, God's job is to make decisions for you?  

I just didn't know that judgment was about making decisions….but more about 'blaming'.  That is how I feel that they look at me, that I am blaming my parents for abuse.  Well, let's see….didn't they abuse their kids?  I made the decision that they did and then it altered my actions.

The very reason that my actions and their actions do not match, is that I made a decision.  

I love that judging is making a decision.  

For I definitely feel that once I made the first huge decision, I had many many more to make.  I had to continue making decisions based upon this one.

THEY ABUSED THEIR CHILDREN.  That is what I decided…and my life changed completely after this decision.

So, they are waiting for God to decide IF they abused their children????

Isn't that what they talked about near my father's dead body???

What is there to decide?

OH, yes, it will then require you to live like me. 

Outside of the family, for father and pedophile have no common denominator.

Mother and accomplice to sexual abuse, have no common denominator.

And there is a vast difference between those who judge and those who do not.

The judging ones make a decision in the cement, there is no going back.

You all know it….so until then, "You will leave the Judging to God"…so you don't have to decide.

But hey, while you are pondering this….what do you think about the judgment I made that my father abused girls???  If you haven't 'decided' on this…you make the little girls liars.

For isn't HE INNOCENT, until proven guilty???

And doesn't that make us guilty Until he is proven innocent?

You all are wimping out on making a line in cement….and while you do, you are discrediting each little girls story.  For, according to the Detective's report that I read, RAY Huhta was not innocent.  And, I made a decision upon hearing a little girl's voice that echoed my fears…I decided then, without even going to trial, that the little girl was correct, she spoke the truth….and it has affected actions incredibly.

I have moved away from anyone who remains undecided.

Your indecision has me guilty and him innocent.

And, from the way I have been ostracized it fits completely.

I am guilty….of what???

Oh yeah of making a decision.

I decided that they abused the children…and there is not one action step that doesn't tell you so.  I have acted completely and relentlessly…for the innocence of the girls.

I am thankful for the conversations blasting me with anger about this word judgment…for now I will understand how it pertains to me completely.  

It is true, I judged my parents….

This was one of the first decisions I made independently…one that I know is supported in truth and fits into reality.  It wasn't a decision based on lies.

I stand in sound judgment!