I M Perfect lady

Category: Art & Quilts

  • Holding the truth…

    Today I worked on making journals…to give away.  These are fun for me to do, like making mini quilts. I like that these journals have pretty covers, for inside the raw truth is often painful…to express.

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    Words written seem less scary once they reach the light of paper…

    I was invited to join the Women's group at the Clubhouse tomorrow.  I will bring a few of these along, if there are women interested in journaling.   IMG_0984

    While making these journals I wondered what the ladies tomorrow will teach me…

    My mother wrote truths and then burnt them saying they were nothing but filth.  Interesting to know she tried to get rid of her past…instead of accepting the darkest parts.

    Is it possible to burn up what you don't like and it will disappear in smoke?

    Somehow to me, the truths are like these journal beautiful in their raw expressions.

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    Some of us have very dark spots in our past, and when we come to understand who we were at the time and our choices…we can find compassion for our darkness.

    My Lady Journals are quite complex…on the outside they have beauty and depth and yet the inside is where the real life stories are found and reflected…Art of being you.

    I am honored to make the covers for so many words…

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    It is brave to face your thoughts and beliefs, to sort them out and lay them bare…

    May these journals be the sacred ground for holding the truth…

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  • Beauty in the Woods!

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    Ever since we have gotten snow such huge amounts of snow, I wondered how the flags were doing in the woods…from my daughter's wedding.  This morning my daughter and I snowshoed in to see how the woods were decorated.

    IMG_0823And, I wanted to be the first to make tracks, to see it untouched as the flags continued to decorate this space.  Beautiful to see them with the white background…

    IMG_0842This is the site of the Vows.  It was so pretty decorated in snow. We could hear the dropping of huge chucks of snow…and I am sure the Trees felt relived of their heavy loads. 

    And the Chickadees came to visit.  They wanted to land on me…and did.

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    The next time we will bring them birdfood!  I can't wait to make a quilt "The Bird Lady"!

    It is so fun to see the way the snow molds itself smooth and round…perfectly.

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    Like a Snow Mushroom!

    And a very artful tree!

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    Beauty in the woods!

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  • Sunrise!

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    This was a sunrise a few days back and I LOVED the Bright Orange in the contrast with the white snow…so, I was inspired to try this in a quilt.

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    And, here is a closer view.  I loved the boots, since half were covered in snow….didn't think it would work to make the illusion of deep snow.  I will have to play with that concept more.

    As you look at the closer view, the quilt in the tree is actually pieced together.  These were small blocks that a woman gave to me, her unfinished peices she no longer was interested in.  HOW cool to have an actual quilt on a quilt!

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    Thanks Gretchen for the inspiration and the Sunrise!

    (this is not quilted…so it could change.)

  • My Potentials!

    This year as I sat with the thoughts of resolutions, I felt that I would do more of what I love…to as one quote said, "Ponder the potentials" in my life.

    How different is this concept instead of pondering what is bad that needs to be fixed?  

    To instead go where the potentials are…

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    I love doing my Ladies. 

    I love the message they carry.

    I love inspiring others who have been abused to find their voices and choices.

    I have much potential and growth in this area.

    2014 will be the year to expand and push the potentials to a new level.

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    How fun to have a year ahead with potentials.

    The feelings are so much more healthy and lighter and brighter, than sitting with a list of things that are broken.

    What is your potential…are you there yet?

    It will take more than a year to fulfill my whole potential…but, what an exciting feeling to know I am not done yet!

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    Just as I am creating quilts on a white slate, so too is our year ahead…what fun will you place in your life?  What will you add? Where will you grow? What new ideas and adventures will you explore?  What new potentials are you willing to try?

    2014 is like a new art piece.

    It starts off blank…and we interview and entertain potentials.

    When doing Art, I don't play with what is wrong or not working, but seek the colors, fabric and designs that excite me.

    This is how I will do my art of self in 2014…living with my potentials!

  • Pattens of Freedom

     

    "Birthdays are new beginnings, but they're also moments of personal closure, which are crucial if we are to grow positively into our authenticity."  Sarah Ban Breathnach

    It is the Eve of my 55th Birthday and as Emily Dickinson said, "We turn, not older with years, but newer every day."  

    I see the new pattern of me becoming more and more distinguished and where my Art and Life resemble each other…the newer me continues to expand.

    The new me continues to arrive, even when her arrival isn't welcome or celebrated, she arrives!  I arrive…as this Me.

    Most have no idea, the cost of changing drastically who you are…in order to live authentic and how there are those who will not celebrate or honor the changes.  And, how it feels to knowingly disappoint and cause anger and fear to arise, as I walk in…differently than what they want and need.

    To remain true to yourself in the face of all who dismiss that self.

    This year has shown me the strength of the new me, the contents and feelings that are so far removed from the shell of me that I was.

    The 55 year old me is so much more inside than the 46 year old me.

    Our insides and beliefs are worlds apart.

    One seems so dark and hollow.

    The other so full and light.

    It isn't the outward appearance that has changed, but inside where the most work has been done.

    The mind has had a complete overhaul and my feelings are dancing and alive.

    I see the old me with a frozen mind, set in its ways…and my feelings locked up and silent.

    How harsh she was…and how hard it was to pretend to pretend it wasn't so. To play, if you will at being alive, but not free to be.

    Maybe it was to pretend to be free while completely under the mind control of a cult like religion and in the clasps of an dysfunctional family.  

    Where you are told what to do and how and are dismissed if you didn't adhere to their needs.

    I celebrate this year as a year where I can clearly see the new me and her patterns of freedom!  

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  • Another Level of Learning.

    I am exploring different avenues to sell art online…should I use Etsy or Square, have it on this blog, or begin a new Imperfect Lady Shop, and, then what to sell and how. This part is work and hurts my brain…and one that I have been putting off for a long time.

    I thought I would need the place to put the art, before actually sitting down and creating inventory.  I have quilts to sell, but not boxes of Cards or sizes of Prints or a Calendar etc.  Geeze Louise, there are options to the options!  But, first I have to know what I want to sell and then find a sight to plop down my Art.

    Each site will take a percentage, but they have the framework in place to make uploading new items, having a shopping cart and a way to pay…and then to deposit the money to me.  

    I guess, I can start slow and add as I go…I can overwhelm myself with the possibilities!

    Here is a quilt that I started last December…all that was done was the background and borders….this year I added the trees and Lady.

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    This picture is blury, but it shows the whole quilt…

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    I know it is early, but she has been half complete for almost a year!

    And, then I also worked on a new one…(both these were quilted at a quilt retreat – two days of quilting)

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    I have been wanting to add metal, and here are some washers painted and added onto a string….not so sure, if this is what I was feeling, but it is a start.

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    She seems the most daring…I love her hat and hair….well her whole demeanor.

    I can easily now, plop down photographs on the blog, and hopefully soon become real adept at doing the same for selling online.  

    My first task is to create a calendar…and a box set of cards. Now, to pick 12 Ladies…and perhaps a quote for each month. And, see the costs and if there would be interest….

    I will learn as I go….for now the road ahead seems dark and unmarked.  But, once I travel it a few times, it will brighten up.

    Sharing my ladies online…has taken some really neat twists and turns or maybe not so online, but simply sharing.  Here's too another level of learning!

     

  • A Wonderful Masterpiece!

    Last night, WIND was treated to a class of Zentangle, by Cari Raboin a Certified Zentangle Instructor. I was mis-informed, and thought it was more about one continuous line and not picking up your pen once you started.  I was way off, delightfully so!

    Zentangle, is more about being in the now.  Using pencils with NO erasers…about not knowing where you going, and adjusting your design as you make new design opportunities..with a drawing error or so your mind thinks. Like Meditational drawing, it keeps you present…away from the future or past.

    For Zentangle, Cari was the perfect instructor and we, all 8 of us, were attentive students.


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    This is my Tile, as they are called.  A 3 by 5 piece of Italian paper…small so as not to be so intimidating, like taking a small step into drawing art.

    She doesn't show us the whole design, but takes us through it one line at a time…like life, we can only know what to do in this moment and won't know what the completed picture will look like, until…


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    Using just pencil (no eraser) and a fine marker, we created a drawing of interest, depth and movement.  

    And, when we put all of ours together, it was quite remarkable.  Each of us, could pick ours out, for we knew our lines, our mark…what our hands had made.

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    How similar and different, how we interpeted or orchestrated her instructions in our own way…and all ways are remarkable and beautiful.

    Zentangle is a Metaphor for Life!

    The tile was divided up into four sections and the individual design that went into each section was called a Tangle.  I love that.  And, each Tangle has a name…which I have already forgotten…and there are hundreds of them.

    I would highly recommend taking a Zentangle class…it brings you back to the early years of coloring; but this time you are part of the whole process!

    It is also a way to look at life differently, to get a broad picture….that all we have to do is work on this step now, and step by step we are creating a wonderful masterpiece.  

    (Our Certified Zentangle Instructor, Cari Raboin teaches classes locally as well as in other areas in the U.P.  Her website is http://www.cctangles.wordpress.com there you can find more information on her upcoming classes and a way to contact her.)

    Cari, my heartfelt thanks for allowing WIND to experience Zentangle…for volunteering your time and passion in the Art of Zentangle! 


  • Unfounded goodness.

    In a conversation I had, someone was saying, that there is a fine line between rebuke and self-righteousness….and that self-righteousness was perhaps the most tricky of all sins.

    I had to look up first, the meaning of Rebuke.

    "express sharp disapproval or criticism of (someone) because of their behavior or actions."  

    I am not aware that rebuking is wrong….is it?

    I then, looked up the word Self-Righteous.

    "Having or characterized by a certainty, esp. an unfounded one, that one is totally correct or morally superior."

    I can see that if you are certain about an unfounded certainty, that you would be off the mark…but if you are certain about a certainty, than you can't be classified as self-righteous.

    The way I am feeling or the message I am getting is that rebuking and self-righteousness are bad, sinful even.

    Which then means, that in the eyes of some, I am being a sinner….for having or more, for expressing sharp disapproval of the abusive behavior of my parents…but not self-righteous, for I am not certain about something unfounded.

    I find these two words being used as warnings….that I best be careful where I tread or how.  Instead, I see them as blinders or stop gaps or safety nets for the folks who don't want to be Found OUT….or called out.

    These 'sins' work remarkably well if you don't want to face sharp disproval.  

    I believe that self-righteousness is a "Tricky Sin" only if you are feeling certain about something unfounded.  

    Again, I am in awe of what fears fall into place….that they are more afraid of 'sinning' than paying attention to who their fellow church members are, what they are doing, and what is the cost of "not sinning" to the children who are waiting for someone to show sharp disproval to the behaviors that is being done to them!

    I guess, in the eyes of many, I have sinned.

    I have sinned.  Not my father….

    I have sinned by rebuking him and for being certain.

    In my opinion, if these two words are similiar and one is a tricky sin, then the opposite of me, is being good.  A non-sinner.  

    Which then explains the silence of the church members.

    But they need to know, self-righteous is a wrong; especially if it is unfounded.

    Certainty is fine….unless you are certain about something that is a lie.

    If this is true, than I see more self-righteous within the familys of abuse…upholding characters of goodness…to folks who are abusing.  That to me, is being self-righteous…holding on to unfounded goodness.



  • Touched by my Art

    The journey with "My Lady" has been one that is unknown and a mystery and enthralling to be part of.  I just never know the bends it will take and the energy she will be given and even the life lessons I will learn in the darkest of times…

    As I sat pondering my path, my stance or stand against abuse; that excludes family and its cost or application…I contemplated silence.  I felt that my art even came at a cost…to stand by her. That perhaps and maybe, I would have more peace and joy by letting HER go.  To be me, but silently. To end the bold and loud display of who I am.  

    And, then….out of the blue a card arrived, on one of my low days.

    A woman who saw my quilts at the Portage Lake Library…expressing how they touched her, spoke to something within her…and, how her late husband was an artist, how she wanted to support me AND MY CAUSE…

    I sat stunned.

    What could I say….that I was going to stop?  That I was too tired…of the side-effects…

    Instead her letter intrigued and excited me…and I was humbled that she had chosen me and my work as something she wanted to contribute to in any way. This gesture out of the blue, moved the clouds of doubt away.

    I was fueled once again.

    I was wondering and pondering again, but in ways that we could conspire to expand the visibility of My Lady.  

    Imagine, going from wanting to darken and hide my Art, to looking for ways to expand her exposure…such is the power of one card.

    Of one person willing to reach out.

    We met.

    We talked.

    We connected.

    We shared.

    We dreamed.

    We conspired.

    My Lady, my admirer and I.

    She wants to remain anoymous…which will be tough for me…and it does add to the mystery.  A Lady behind My Lady and I.

    I want her to be part of the process to be active and engaged…yet hidden.  

    One of the best parts of My Lady, is meeting other women who connect with her, who find her energy contageous, who love her independence and strength, her courage and fearlessness.

    We met woman to woman; and spoke of what we could do to bring out "My Lady" spirit in other women, to encourage them to make a change, to take the first step in growing, to dare to do something for themselves…

    After the deluge of unbelievers in me, it felt good to have this woman understand me.  She even said at one point, "your family doesn't even know this you, the you you have become…" and she is right.

    And, they may never know her.

    She is a motherly type, a woman as complex as My Lady…and she is stepping up to help me and my cause…because she was touched by my Art.

     
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  • Tree of Inspiration!

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    This tree I pass each work day four times…it has a personality to me.  It is an apple tree, but often is quite sparse…and it hangs on to a few leaves long after the rest are gone.  One year it had apples long into winter.  This is the tree that inspired the tree in one of my latest quilts.


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    Her branches seem to flow in one direction….I like that.

    Funny, how there are certain nature spots along the way that become like familiar friends….and they change with the seasons and yet stay the same.


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    Here is a closer view with the few leaves on her limbs. 

    And, the fabric image….she inspired.


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    Tree or Inspiration!