"I know that over the years, through fear and expectation, my mind has gathered and hoarded places I needed to go, things I needed to have, selves I needed to be. But here I am, without most of them – the goals and wants all used up in learning how to love."
"So, try as I do to imagine and construct where I am headed, try as I will to plan and know what this life of feeling means, it is the pulse of what I feel itself that lifts me into spirit. In truth, wings don't grow any differently to fit south or east or west, and our lives, no matter how we train ourselves are more fundamental than any direction of worldly ambition. We, like birds, are meant to fly and sing – that's all – and all our plans and schemes are twigs of nest that, once outgrown we leave." Mark Nepo
What I took away from today's reading, is that no matter what we think we need to be doing or where we think we should be, all we can do is live where we are right now and do so fully being with what is.
It matters not if you have goals or destinations, in order to get there you live.
You live whether you have lofty goals or not, whether you have intelligent wants, or righteous destinations. You live.
For me the more I concentrated on goals or end games, the less I lived right now, for I was living for a certain outcome. Bypassing this day, focusing on the one over there.
Now I just live and an outcome happens. Often times a surprise destination appears.
It seems rather careless in a world that wants you to keep in mind your destination and to groom your life to assure you end up where you planned on going…to NOT plan, but live.
In my past, this moment in time was just something to overlook, for my mind was focused on the goal….tomorrow, when, and If.
When you live staring at the horizon, you miss what is right here, right now.
The sights, the smells, the sounds, the people…all the opportunities to be alive and engaged in living.
It truly doesn't matter where we end up, for there are so many days and hours to live before we get there. Some how we feel that when we get there life will begin, when in actuality, living in this day is to live.
Living in this day has to matter more than any lofty goal in mind.
If you can't fully live this day, you are wasting days waiting for the goal to appear.
We somehow have been sold a bill of goods called, goals, dreams etc…that steal our attention from living today.
Maybe it is when your future starts to shrink, that you can see how fruitless it was.
What good is a goal if all the days leading up to it your not living, but counting the days till you arrive. Imagine all the days spent and passed by, giving up for this goal. It is like the goal has stolen your everyday life.
Living without staring at goals or focusing on a certain outcome, will allow you to live and breathe better in this day.
Imagine how you could live today, IF it didn't have to be a step towards a goal.
You could be careless and things wouldn't matter if they fit into the 'plan'.
You could be a live living work of art…where you truly don't know how you will end up when you get 'there'. Live without a firmly painted goal or pictured outcome.
Live… allowing the ending to be a surprise.
I M Perfect lady 