We teach people how to treat us, we send out signals as to what is okay and what is not, we literally are teaching the friends and folks we want to hang with.
They don’t know our boundaries we have to show them.
When you do that, I tend to move away.
When you your words and actions don’t match, I learn that you don’t follow what you say, I honor that.
If I give you the freedom to act with your free will, than I get to react with mine.
It isn’t a lopsided game of only one having more power; we each get our own set of power tools.
My husband would teach our children a new thing, like putting on a new roof, and tell them, you have a new talent in our toolbox.
This toolbox is yours; it is something that you carry with you where ever you go, a skill that makes you more self-sufficient.
They also have another tool box, a self esteem or self worth tool box, and I wonder what skills and tools I gave them to erect boundaries, set limits, uphold values or define values, be ruled by morals, just what is in their own box when they leave this family.
Will my values be theirs and should they be?
Will our morals match?
Is it possible that the apple does fall far from the tree and roll away?
If you have done all you can do, if the fruit is ripe to fall, do you have any say as to where it goes and how it grows?
Is there only so far a parent can take them and the rest they do on their own?
Experience being their secondary teacher, do they travel onward being led by an inner feeling no matter the source?
Is it possible that you can build the perfect emotional toolbox, one that resembles reality and truth, and they can kick it aside and set out on their own unlearning all of that?
A rebel with a cause.
The cause of doing it my way…
While I concentrated on healing my limb of the family tree, I may have overlooked the fruits growing on the limb, to see the color changing…to see a new fruit growing.
In reality I am seeing an orange from an apple tree.
As she clings to this whole new lifestyle she leaves behind her family tree, just as I left mine.
She doesn’t want to have to choose, but I am thinking it is pretty hard to mesh the two lives, the two selves, the old and the new into a new one…without see what truly is.
You have to let go of who you are to become what you wish to be…
In order to become a whole me, I had to leave the rotting tree…
I M Perfect lady 