My daughter asked me to clarify, that the abuse I speak of is not sexual, it is not rape, it is not fondling, it is I guess a light form of abuse, it is cheating.
There has been no physical abuse to her body.
While this may satisfy those who view abuse to be only sexual or physical in any manner, there is another level or spectrum of abuse.
The psychic damage that lies beneath what the naked eye can see, its affects can only be seen by the actions of the body.
Where it moves and how it acts, whether it has radar for when it either abuses or is abused.
The damage psyche has a hard time discerning what is abuse and what is love, it has been led slowly and over time to shut down the body and its signals.
It is running amuck and out of control, it is doing things that someone in their ‘right mind’ would not do.
This psychic blindness to morals and values doesn’t happen overnight, it is a process, a slow and laborious time consuming process, it happens with saturation of crafty words, pretty messages, long winded conversations, a preaching of sorts.
My daughter’s cell phone has recorded this outpouring of emotional cheating.
Near 5,000 minutes in one month of talking…at least this is what our current bill shows.
Plus another 3,000 text messages.
Now, I will agree that there are a few sprinkled odd calls, but the most favored number appears over and over and over like a broken recorded, beating and beating, and beating, and beating…
Some will say, I am over reacting, blowing it out of proportion that I have lost my mind or it is proof that I am certifiably nuts.
But, I stand as I have stood and say, this MARRIED man, has taken advantage of his babysitter, he is abusing not only his wife, his children and my daughter, but he has changed the peace within our home.
Some say, she too owns her part. I will agree. I now hold her responsible for the way this continues, how the road twists and turns, what bumps we will take, how this cheating dance that I have blown out of proportion will affect my happy home.
It seems that my daughter and I are standing face to face, she has to lose what she loves or I have to lose what I love.
She is standing in a spot that is very difficult to maneuver out of. You will lose something, you just have to decide what.
She has to see where the biggest part of her self is.
She has to feel down deeply and act accordingly.
I have to honor her choice.
I have had lots more practice losing.
I told my husband, I have lost so much there isn’t much of my heart left to break, that he with his big as a house heart may have bear the brunt of it, hold me up, hold her up and carry us forward.
It is out of my hands, has been out of my hands, it is out of my control, all I can do is allow the Universe to turn the corner, to take the next step and follow where it leads.
If my lesson is total and unconditional love for her, she has it.
I will love her no matter what.
I will love and understand that she is doing what it is she is meant to do.
I will not kick her when she is down.
I love the confused girl, the almost woman, and the innocence she once was, there is no part of her I don’t love.
I love now without conditions.
I M Perfect lady 