If you are not trying to change, you do not have any choices to make, you just keep repeating what you have been doing, there will be no inner struggle, no wondering or thinking, no stressing about how you will handle each new moment that arrives, where you will again be asked to make a choice, differently.
If you don’t make a new choice you remain unchanged, and if you do make a new choice you will be changed, but grow further and further from your old familiar ways.
Not changing is easy; it is mindless and falls effortlessly within your life, like smoke seeping into each minute.
Change is like breathing new air into each choice we are asked to make daily, the small and the large, the complicated and the simple, each little decision has to be dealt with as a if you were a new arrival on earth, yet with the magnetic draw of a long held pattern.
To jump the track of an old pattern isn’t as easy as one suspects and you will not know until you are actually the one doing the heavy lifting.
Heavy lifting is doing the opposite of what you are used to, the complete and total opposite is required in order to change.
You can’t change your life by doing nothing different, by not affecting your world and each relationship in it, the only way to change is to allow waves of new you flow into everything in your life.
Since you are the common denominator in your world and with all whom you spend time with, if you change, all will feel the ripple affect.
If there is no ripple, you haven’t changed.
In the book, “Tattoos on the Heart” by Gregory Boyle, he is speaking to a gang member who is asking “How many homies have you buried…you know, killed because of gangbanging?
“Seventy-five, son,” (this was some years ago. If he asked today, it would be more than twice that number.)
“Damn, G, seventy-five?” He shakes his head in disbelief, his voice a bare hush now. “I mean, damn…when’s it gonna end?”
I reach down to Omar and go to shake his hand. We connect and I pull him to his feet. I hold his hand with both of mine and zero in on his eyes.
“Mijo, it will end,” I say, “the minute…you decide.”
The moistening of his eyes surprises me. He grabs my hands in his.
“Well,” he says, “then, I decide.”
“Omar,” I tell him, “it has always been as simple as that.”
“How many things have to happen to you,” Robert Frost writes, “before something occurs to you?”
Change awaits us. What is decisive is our deciding.
Gregory Boyle
When you decide, change will happen!
I M Perfect lady 