While reading in “Shattered Dreams” by Irene Spencer, I came upon a paragraph that struck a cord within me.
She is describing the polygamy Principle, which is commonly known by Principle.
“A teaching that was to have a grave impact on how I lived my life can be summed up quite simply as follows; People may fail the Principle, but the principle itself never fails.”
This is how many folks look upon religion, as seeing how the people fail IT, and not that IT fails the people.
She goes on to write, “My mother lived in a religious no-win situation. She was devoted to a tradition that defeated her.”
Imagine being devoted to something that defeats you?
What struck me as I pictured this girl watching her mother struggle with plural marriage, was in how she didn’t see her mother’s defeat, but wondered more about her own strength to endure…she never considered breaking the chain of polygamy.
My estrangement with my mother happened because I was determined to break the chain of mothering as she mothered. I believe each of us have either the strength to endure and continue on the chain or legacy….or the strength to break the chain.
And there are many women who feel empowered by holding up doctrines and belief systems, while they are defeated by them. What they see isn’t the lack of self, but rather the success of not allowing the belief to die.
I had said that my mother’s greatest strength, was her blindness. And now I understand that her blindness was of her self or what the cost had on her family to uphold the doctrine of the Forgiveness of Sins. That is the Principle of the FALC.
As Irene writes, “…when the children of the covenant lacked the courage to live polygamy for themselves, it was always the fault of the human weakness and sin, never a problem with the Principle.”
My mother never could see any fault with the church and would not hear a word that would go against her Principle Belief. We became invisible to her. Her main focus was always to be loyal to what I feel was helping to defeat her.
Putting her Faith in the Principle (forgiveness of sins) was always a higher need than her own childrens or her own. We came in second, always…and in doing so, it defeated our family from the git go.
We were born into a system where we came second from day one…and there was no way to move ahead, if anything we fell lower on the totem pole as the years went by.
It is very disheartening to see that in your mother’s eyes you stand behind the system that defeated her. And in order to get along with her, you too have to be defeated.
Defeated I left my relationship with her, for she couldn’t see how damaging she was to herself, to our family and to me.
Her beliefs destroyed everything…while holding high her faith in the Principle. The Principle won, always.
Category: Books
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The Principle Won, always.
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Eyes of a Child
While mowing the grass last night it came to me that the attacking and jousting for position isn’t about whether there is abuse or not abuse, what was right or wrong, or even the way it is treated or not treated, but rather a more subtle yet ferocious component, it is the fear of no love.
I have mistaken this for the strength of love, but it is actually velocity of fear.
Many of the old Masters and wise teachers have all alluded to this; you get to live your life based on fear or on love.
What we are experiencing is as old as time, the two energies showing their true natures, two sides meeting and clashing, the polar opposites opposing each other.
Fear is False Events Appearing Real, so what we really have is the battle between the truth and what is not the truth.
Don Miguel Ruiz writes, “You know, most people around the world believe that there is a great conflict in the Universe, a conflict of good and evil. Well, that is not true. It’s true that there is a conflict, but the conflict only exists in the human mind, not in the Universe. It’s not true for the plants or the animals. It’s not true for the stars and the trees, or for the rest of nature. It’s only true for humans. And the conflict in the human mind is not between good and evil. The real conflict in our mind is between the truth and what is not the truth, between the truth and lies. Good and evil are just the result of that conflict. The result of believing in the truth is goodness, love, happiness. When you live your life in truth, you feel good, and your life is wonderful. The result in believing lies creates what you call evil; it creates fanaticism. Believing in lies creates all of the injustices, all of the violence and abuse, all of the suffering, not only in society but also in the individual. The Universe is as simple as it is or it is not, but humans complicate everything.” Don Miguel Ruiz
Life is really this simple, it is or it is not.
What we are arguing about is what is or what is not.
Who is or who is not.
It isn’t complicated or deep and children do this well.
Don Miguel writes, “"As little children, we are completely authentic. We never pretend to be what we are not. Our tendency is to play and explore, to live in the moment, to enjoy life. Nobody teaches us to be that way; we are born that way. This is our true nature before we learn to speak."
This is what I believe Jesus meant by believing like little children; to be in the truth, to walk with the truth, to see the truth, to be authentic.
Read more from Don Miguel on this subject in Carl’s blog,
www.messyguru.typepad.com Titled, "Being Effortless."
What Don Miguel stated, “The result in believing lies creates what you call evil; it creates fanaticism.” Fanaticism is the key component that makes up cults or extreme religions; they are not based on extreme love.
Fanatics are extremists, and from my experience of the FALC they all believe in lies… Lies, which create evil.
The lies I am speaking most generally about is, that they believe they can wash away reality and that it will no longer exist, and that is one major lie.
The mother of all lies that follow.
They have complete faith in something that isn’t real, their faith and trust is placed fear.
And this act alone creates the fanatical responses, the evil energies we feel attacking us. We do not feel the energies of love, but the biting words of fear.
And sometimes after they bite us, they come back with ‘love’ words; they try hiding their fear with kind words, for even their own evil scares them.
What I hadn’t considered or understood was the level or degree of evil and lies they had faith in, and how frightened or terrified they are to have it disclosed and revealed…
However, I recall vividly the moment all my true lies collapsed, when all I had faith in evaporated and the terror it left me standing in…and yet in the exact same moment when my world collapsed a grand new one was born, the world of truth.
And I truly became like a child again. I didn’t hear what people were saying, but I watched their actions. Words became meaningless, actions was the true path I followed.
This world of truth became a spectacular landscape which was very easy to walk in, it was steady and never changing, and there was nothing I had to learn, do or believe in, it was all there in front of me.
I gave up all past beliefs and thoughts, and simply walked in life with eyes of a child.
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They speak in Lies.
Don Miguel Ruiz said “There are two kinds of Angels, the angel of lies and the angel of truth.”
Isn’t it odd to look at the two different kinds of angels?
I know that my family does not like to see me as an Angel of Truth; they would love me much better as the Angel of Lies, and the way I used to be.
Oh was I a good angel of lies. I was the best, I would tell you anything you wanted to hear, but never, not ever the truth…for I wouldn’t want to hurt you.
I was a good angel of lies and my self suffered greatly.
For in order to be a wonderful angel of lies, you lose your self. You turn away from your own feelings, and choose not to see others in their true colors.
The Angel of Truth speaks with impeccable words, her actions match and she says what she has to say, no matter how they land upon your world.
I have lived both ways and as the Angel of Lies, I seen the world through glasses that lied to me. I lied and it lied back.
I pretended many things, overlooked much, and didn’t see life as it was in its naked rawness and beauty.
While my journey has been horrific in many places, where the truth is exposed like a monster, I have also seen great beauty, love, peace and joy, that my lying angel refused to see.
When I first began to see without my lying eyes, I saw things that brought me to my knees, okay flat in bed. But those same eyes bathed my body in nature’s beauty.
I seen the sunrise and felt God looking upon me. The night sky was filled with loving angels, the moon another loving presence.
I watched the flow of the river and knew that same energy flowed through me.
My truthful eyes saw God everywhere.
So, while it was hard to get used to my truthful eyes, especially seeing that which prior I covered with lies, it was also the biggest blessing in my world.
I love that I can see now as God sees.
I love that there are angels of lies and angels of truth.
I love that I have been able to be both in this lifetime.
What I know is that many in my family are loving their roles as Angels of Lies, and they are being rewarded by staying close to their mother, their siblings, a family of lying Angels, all resuming life after a bit of truth blew in, they quickly got back to life as it was before.
And it is very different when you begin to see truth; you are set aside from the liars. Our words and actions don’t match; our wings clash.
I flew alone for a while and slowly I am finding Angels of Truth to hang with. We are a rare bunch, seen as mental by some, cold and bitter by others…(hey, isn’t it said that truth is often times a bitter pill to swallow.) We are often depicted as home wreckers, spoil sports, insane, crazy, mad…
What I know to be true for me is that life as an Angel of Truth is magnificent, easy, peaceful, wise, perfect, and it walks hand and hand with God.
I do recognize that when I speak as the Angel of Truth, I will get feedback that isn’t kind or supportive or loving from the Angels of Lies. They are first to spread lies about me, that is their role. They are only doing what Angels of Lies do…they speak in lies.
Don Miguel says there is only one conflict in the human experience; the conflict between truth and lies.
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Voice of my truth.
Today I listened to the CD of The Voice of Knowledge, by Don Miguel Ruiz and Janet Mills.
Here is how the book is described.
"In this audio version of the fourth book in the popular series, don Miguel Ruiz reminds readers of a profound yet simple truth: The only way to end emotional suffering and restore joy in living is to stop believing in lies – mainly about ourselves."
"Ruiz refers to the forbidden tree of knowledge, likening the abandonment of the true self to the fall from heaven. This fall, he says, occurred because of the loss of "the impeccability of the word," that simple yet potent prescription for countering the judgmental inner "Voice of Knowledge." Adhering to "the word" – saying only what one means, refusing to speak against one's self – allows anyone to quiet those inner tyrannical thoughts so that we can become aware of our Voice of Integrity. Knowledge then becomes an ally, and life becomes an expression of the authentic self."
As I listened to him, I could see how my own life was based upon lies and how I had great faith in those lies and had little or no faith in my own truth and integrity.
What this blog has been mostly about is re-discovering my truth and letting go of lies.
I have tried my level best to rid myself of inauthentic parts of me, the beliefs that kept me from my own love, peace and joy…and in doing so I oftentimes uncovered lies that many don’t want displayed openly. My truth-seeking mission has upset many an apple cart for me, but it seems it has little affect on others unless they are ready to receive the truth…if they are not ready, the truth will slip on by…and their cart of lies will remain steady.
I am not here to upset your cart of apples, but rather to find the rotten parts of myself, my lies. Sometimes my lies and your lies match and at others you will not agree…that is okay, I am here only to seek my own truth. Each of you will find yours in your own time. This is my journey towards truth in my life.
It was just great to listen to him speak about the conflict of lies and truth we all have within, and how in some the truth voice is louder than the lies.
If you have never questioned your mind, or explored how you came to believe this or that, your lies remain unchallenged…or your truth unearthed. Your lie voice may be louder for it has had free reign.
I had buried so many truths, so much hurt I piled into a hole not to be touched, emotions shoved aside, etc…all to be more comfortable I lived lies. My lie voice liked it that way.
We think lies are bold and in your face, but they are not.
Mostly what I think is truth comes in and we push it away, not wanting to deal, to see or feel.
So we lie. We lie to ourselves and say everything is okay.
I only stopped lying to myself when all my lies came home to roost at one time. There was an avalanche that I couldn’t stop…all my lies lay at my feet exposed for the traitors they were. Their powerful deceit was bigger than any lie I could conjure up.. to cover them all up again. It had grown too huge. My lie voice died and my weak truthful voice started to speak.
It gained power with each truth I told.
I am wondering if there is a room where lies go and will it explode on everyone at one time or another?
When my life of lies exploded I was left with my soul eyes. My body seemed to have eyes in feelings; intuitively I sorted out my life…I began speaking from deep inside, paying little heed to the outside disputes.
While it seemed like the worst day of my life, it was actually the first day of the rest of my voice of integrity life. A life without lies.
No more lies.
Not to me and not to you.
Not to make you feel better or more at peace for your comfort or for your ease.
No more lies to my self.
For I lost myself behind a sea of lies…and it took me years to unhook myself from the beliefs and faith I had in these lies.
My voice is the voice of my truth.
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Living on the Blocks.
Week 9, The Artist Way…Julia Cameron writes,
“We’re more comfortable being a victim of artist’s block than risking having to consistently be productive and healthy.
“An artistic U-Turn arrives on a sudden wave of indifference. We greet our newly minted product or our delightful process with “Aw, what does it matter anyhow? It’s just a start. Everybody else is so much further ahead…”
“Yes, and they will stay that way if we stop working. The point is we have traveled light-years from where we were when we were blocked. We are now on the road, and the road is scary. We begin to be distracted by roadside attractions or detoured by the bumps.”
And here are a few sentences from the exercises at the end of the chapter.
“Your choice to block is a creative U-Turn – we turn back on ourselves. Like water forced to stand still, we turn stagnant.” Julia
These blocks are in Life and in Art. And we use them as an excuse as to why we can’t live a better life or create art.
And it is only ourselves that turn us around and heads us back to our old vices and excuses or fears. We keep turning our backs on our truths, our desires, what we love, what brings us peace, our joy…in the good energy flow.
I see my life as a river where others lives are rocks cropping up or interests that are not crucial to my pathway, and instead of floating on by, I stop. I stop my own flow in life.
We each have specific rocks that stop us and then there are bends in the river, opportunities that float by, but we are too afraid to slip into the flow…or we are so busy doing things that are not important and they go by unnoticed.
It is just so interesting that Artist Blocks or Blocks of Addictions keep us from creativity…and they are all our choices.
It is up to us to stop clinging to things that don’t serve us, that keeps us from living.
One big boulder in my life is ‘Responsibility’ and getting my work done first.
I focus on cleaning up my space instead of using that time to create. I put so many rocks ahead of my flow, that my life seems heavy and hard.
I never looked at it this way…even though I lived it more often than not. In fact slipping into the flow of life and playing in the currents and relaxing and letting the river take me, without saying no…is not very common in my life.
Most of my life has been spent on heavy rocks and in other people’s responsibility. Getting used to flowing in my life will take some effort and will mean turning my back on ‘work’. Who knew that work is a blockage in your life.
Today, my one day off, and again I am working on cleaning up our house, the sewing machine sits…however, I did make a date with my husband for later on.
In time, I will be able to discern how much free flowing time I have had and how much I have spent on the rocks, for I will feel its heaviness and know I got lost again living on the blocks.
"Saying No can be the ultimate self-care." Claudia Black
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Extreme in Religion
There was a haunting phrase in the book, “Inside the Kingdom” by Carmen Bin Laden. After she separated from her husband she bumped into one of her favorite brother-in-laws, and he explained how he could no longer be her friend.
“You may be right, but my brother is never wrong.”
This sentiment or mindset is similar to how people feel about their family members, that they MUST always see them doing what is right, no matter what. Or even church members are giving a huge margin of error compared to those not in the clan.
This so poignantly describes how family members cannot see their father outside the lens of that title.
That at the end of the day, “You may be right, but my father is never wrong.” I feel this totally, that my father can never be wrong. It is an awkward place to stand in. They will shun me to have a ‘right’ father.
I thoroughly enjoyed listening to the ways of the Saudi people and could see such pointed similarities. Perhaps somewhat less extreme, but still debilitating to the women of the FALC.
Our veils were not made of cloth, but as Carmen said, she carried her jail upon her back…by submitting to or allowing another to tell you what to do with your own body.
The Arabic word woman comes from the root word Sin and that is how the ladies are treated. Just by being born a woman, you lose all rights.
They cover up their sins…so the woman has to be hidden.
How like the FALC church…
And the word Islam means submission…
One other idea she wrote about is that in this strict society, that it is never ‘bad’ to be too extreme. That it is seen as good to be excessively strict or religious.
Imagine you can never be too extreme in religion…
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Not being Free.
I listened to a woman speak yesterday in her audio book, Carmen Bin Laden “Inside the Kingdom”, my life in Saudi Arabia… She was raised in Europe and married the brother to Osama Bin Laden.
So she had to do as women do in that country… she lost her freedom as she covered herself up.
She married her husband in the 70’s. Both had lived in the United States and went to college here, so her vantage point is as a woman who was free going to not being free.
It was interesting to hear that the women and men felt they ‘respected’ woman by making them hide and not show themselves.
How odd.
We respect you so much that you are to become invisible???
She explained how the world looked from behind the dark veil, how you cloudy and dark all things were. How when she left the country and could be without the veil, how crisp and clear and fresh all things looked.
And how when she was in a large group of women, she lost her sisters, for they all appeared as dark triangles. There was no way for even the women to tell who was who; they all just blended into covered triangles.
She said it was like entering a parallel universe, for it was completely foreign and she said little by little she allowed her self to be taken over.
What is so interesting to me is that she is a grown woman, who in order to be ‘loved’ by her husband and his family had to hide behind the veil, giving up all her free rights as a human being.
Coming from the outside she could see things so differently than the women born into this society.
The ones born in this didn’t even know that they had another choice available.
While listening to her, you can see how the beliefs and lifestyles mindlessly get handed down. Girls are treated differently from the day they are born; they are never groomed to have rights.
What is so odd is that the men/boys would get in trouble for seeing a bare unveiled woman. So they are taught it is wrong to see a women without her being hidden.
The value systems are set in place in childhood…
The extreme societies are extreme examples.
Yet on the scales of freedom, a loss of individual power is still a loss. Some of us are in the process of getting our power back, enabling us to shed the veils or silken chains of not being able to own our own lives.
Carmen is showing me the extreme cases of women being brainwashed into succumbing and giving up the right to breath fresh air, to see clearly, to walk freely…and yet it is my belief, that while many women in the FALC don’t wear a darkened veil, they are just as imprisoned.
Albeit on a lesser scale, but not being free is not being free.
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Guilt and Judgment
Yesterday as I rode along my mail route, I listened to The Course of Miracles coming from my Kindle…I have it strapped to the headrest so I can hear it without headphones.
A jotted down a few things that seared my mind…and then this morning wanted to go back and find the text, but I haven’t been able to find all sections that caught my ear.
Here is one I found.
“When you feel guilty, remember that the ego has violated the laws of God, but you have not. Leave the “sins” of the ego to me. That is what Atonement is for. But until you change your mind about those whom your ego has hurt, the Atonement cannot release you. While you feel guilty your ego is in command, because only the ego can experience guilt.”
I stopped and wrote that down. “Only the ego can feel guilty” this was an incredible thing to hear for its implications are mountainous. No one ever has said, “sins of the ego” instead they act like our spirit has sinned and in order to get a clean spirit to heaven you have to get it forgiven. Imagine if you raised a child to understand there is an ego and there is spirit?
Imagine learning that there are two ways to view the world, by ego or by spirit…and to know this as a child.
If only the ego feels guilt, what is religion for? So when we were made to feel sinful and unworthy who were they talking to??? It has to be the ego, for if the only the ego can experience guilt, they surely were not talking to our spirits.
I also wrote down, The ego can’t Know, that Knowing is of the Spirit. The ego can’t know, it perceives and the spirit can’t perceive, it Knows.
Here is something else I hadn’t considered.
“The ego and the spirit do not know each other. The separated mind cannot maintain the separation except by dissociating. Having done this, it denies all truly natural impulses, not because the ego is a separate thing, but because you want to believe that you are. The ego is a device for maintaining this belief, but it is still only your decision to use the device that enables and endures ”
This makes perfect sense to me, for when I was a fully engaged ego whom I lovingly call “the mental woman” I had zero contact with my Spirit…I love that they don’t know each other.
And imagine…the ego is a device use for separation?
To me it kept me separated from God and Spirit.
Then, came a section on Judgment…
“Have you really considered how many opportunities you have had to gladden yourself, and how many of them you refused? There is no limit to the power of a Son of God, but he can limit the expression of his power as much as he chooses. Your mind and mine can unite in shining your ego away, releasing the strength of God into everything you think and do. Do not settle for anything less than this, and refuse to accept anything but this as your goal. Watch your mind carefully for any beliefs that hinder its accomplishment, and step away from them. Judge how well you have done this by your own feelings, for this is the one right use of Judgment. Judgment, like any other defense, can be used to attack or protect; to hurt or heat. The ego should be brought to judgment and found wanting there. Without your own allegiance, protection and love, the ego cannot exist. Let it be judged truly and you must withdraw allegiance, protection and love from it.”
It seems that the church taught us to judge another, but not to judge the ego. I love that we are to judge how we are doing by how we are feeling.
Mostly what I listened to yesterday were the differences between the ego and the soul…and it made sense to me.
“Any thought system that confuses God and the body must be insane. Yet this confusion is essential to the ego, which judges only in terms of threat or non-threat to itself. In one sense the ego’s fear of God is at least logical, since the idea of Him does dispel the ego. But fear of the body, with which the ego identifies so closely, makes no sense at all. The body is the ego’s home by its own election. It is the only identification with which the ego feels safe, since the body’s vulnerability is its own best argument that you cannot be of God.”
Imagine, the ego only judges what is a threat or non-threat to itself. It could care less of how this impacts your life or your souls journey.
It was so beneficial to my peace of mind to listen to the antics of the ego and its needs and how they contrast directly the spirit, and it made perfect sense to me in my experience.
And when you read this book, depending upon who has a greater control in your world, the spirit or the ego, it will land differently as you read it
I am not here to try and convince anyone, I am here to share what I heard. It brought me peace…and it helped me understand the confusion I have with religion, for it seems to me that religion courts the ego with guilt and judgment.
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My eyes are on Healing
Yesterday as I listened to Oprah speak of how her Audience over the years allowed and cheered her to be her authentic self, it also enabled her to inspire us to be more ourselves. As she opened up and shared her life with us, we also opened up and shared ours.
There is this open swinging space that if you stand in your truth, those around you will do the same…and it works the opposite too, if you hide, they hide.
She spoke of how she learned from sexual abusers about the grooming process and how they lure you into trusting them…and she realized, “It wasn’t my fault.”
This wisdom she passed on. Her one regret was that she wasn’t able to shine a big enough light upon sexual abuse, but that she did what she could over the years.
I am thinking we can each take on this task.
On a much smaller scale the blogs are doing the same…we are trying to shine a light of truth upon an issue that has affected our lives deeply and we know is still going on.
Just like her, we are using our voices the best way we can.
We are sharing our truths, our pain, our abuse, and we are sharing what we discovered, what we learned and how we see things.
As more blogs come forth and more people begin the dialogue, change will happen. Minds will open; questions will be asked…the tides will turn.
We will go from hiding skeletons to displaying our family wounds in order to heal. Hiding isn’t healing.
The difference it has made to have one other family come out and share their truths is huge. Its impact will be felt far and wide…the ripple affects will reach places we can’t even begin to imagine.
To not be the only family speaking out…means we are not alone.
I know the cost of speaking your truth and I know its rewards…and more importantly, I know the cost of silence.
Martha Beck writes about Heroes and Fear in Oprah’s Magazine this month.
“Heroes aren’t free from fear; they’re just so focused on a worthy goal that they feel they can’t turn back. Most of humankind’s great achievements – the sorts of things that make us say, “Oh, Wow!” – were accomplished by people who were muttering, “OH Shit!” Heroes don’t feel special, just dogged. They walk their scary paths with shaky knees and trembling hands. One shaky step at a time.”
Jim is a Hero!
Carl is a Hero!
Judy and Erin…Heroines!
Here is another part of her fear article that I like.
“When you shoot,” my friend Jim, a hockey player, once told me, “you never want to look at the goalie. Look at the space around him. Where your eyes go, the puck goes.” A white water kayaker warned me, “Look at the water, not the rocks. Where your eyes go, the boat goes.” My riding instructor shouted, “Look where you want to go, not where you don’t. Where the eyes go, the horse goes.”
“Got it? Where your attention goes, our lives go. As you take each step, be peripherally aware of the dangers, but glue your attention to the path between them.”
I love Martha’s wisdom.
My eyes are on healing…
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Outside of Time.
While listening to Mark Nepo (Author of The Book of Awakening) talking to Oprah on Sirius Radio, he shared a moment in his life where he had lost his job, had an unknown illness and was going to confront his father he had been estranged from. He was afraid, in fear or in the unknown in the past, present and future, so he went deeper and sat with his soul.
I understood completely, for when my life turned upside down and my past seemed to horrifying to look at, the future a vast landscape of empty and unknown and the present was littered with my father’s rubbish…I too went deeper and found my soul.
I didn’t call it my soul, but now I know that is where I went.
A place that was untouched by time and events, but it was calm and knowing, a Self I had never met.
I remember feeling this very deep calm knowing and strength, although I had no idea where it came from in the midst of such a churning moment in my life.
Everything was falling down around me and I was deep beneath it all learning incredible lessons and seeing things that no one else could see.
I get this; I had connected with my soul when my life fell apart. What I now know is that when your past, present and future fall down, you get left standing in the unchanging part of you, the place that survives all life experiences.
I went from living in time, to being timeless. Time was too fearful to be in.
What I also know is that once you take your self out of time, or are shocked and flung out of your life, you can see things from a deeper and wider view, prior to that I was tangled up in time and had no deeper perspective.
I dwelled in the land of time without a connection to the deep well of wisdom, my soul.
I love that I have this explanation.
One other thing he mentioned that really connected with me was that “Surrender doesn’t mean giving up, it means going with the Flow.”
He explained that you have to flow all the way through whatever experience you are in in order to get the full lesson. That giving up isn’t the answer, but being in it fully… going in all the way. Accepting what is.
Mostly I have heard that surrender is giving up or just letting it be, but I hadn’t heard that it means heading in fully.
That is exactly how I faced my life situations after my father’s arrest. I didn’t duck, I didn’t hide and I didn’t deny.
Instead I walked fully into each moment of time, but I had this wonderful deep intimate connection with my soul, I never walked alone; I was connected to a place outside of time.
(What a great hour listening to him talk. I bought his book, but gave it to a friend; I am thinking I need one for me.)
I M Perfect lady 